Trivial things you don't understand/mildly annoy you

[donkey]

Haha, I'm off to write some reviews for you now:) Coming soon...

"The chicken tasted too chickeny"
"I asked for my Gazpacho soup as soon as it was ready, but when it arrived it was cold"

and many many more.

I'd call that Gazpacho Soup Day...

[flammableBen]

"We read about this place on tripadvisor and decided it wasn't for us" 2/5

[Honkytonk]

From where I work that is, not in general. I quite like children.

They're delicious pickled.

I worked in a gastropub in Canary Wharf for a bit, and fuck me were there some children I wanted to murder. This one posh kid, about 10yrs old (called Barnaby) would run around like he'd just downed 40 cans of red bull. He tripped up a waitress once, and he was fucking lucky she'd just dropped off a load of drinks at a table and wasn't carrying a tray full of empties. His parents (Jasper and Emmeline- yes, I fucking know) proceeded to have a go at the poor girl for hurting their son. This one family of toffs would come in every Sunday, without reservation, and expect 'their' table (a four) to be left vacant. I broached the subject of reserving tables with the father when he was paying his bill and he looked at me as if I'd just asked him if he wanted to go down in the beer cellar, let me tie him up, and then play cricket with his balls.

Never got a decent tip either. What is it with people being happy to spend £200 on sunday lunch and a bottle of champagne, but they won't leave 10% for the overworked fuckers on minimum wage who've had to put up with them and their snotty little kids all day, and will have to put up with more once they've left.

Oh great, FB, now I've started ranting.

[Bukkake Regiment]

"We read about this place on tripadvisor and decided it wasn't for us" 2/5

How long have you run a restaurant for? Good work.

[flammableBen]

How long have you run a restaurant for? Good work.

Just work at. Not run. I wouldn't take advantage of others people's labour like that.

[flammableBen]

They're delicious pickled.

I worked in a gastropub in Canary Wharf for a bit, and fuck me were there some children I wanted to murder. This one posh kid, about 10yrs old (called Barnaby) would run around like he'd just downed 40 cans of red bull. He tripped up a waitress once, and he was fucking lucky she'd just dropped off a load of drinks at a table and wasn't carrying a tray full of empties. His parents (Jasper and Emmeline- yes, I fucking know) proceeded to have a go at the poor girl for hurting their son. This one family of toffs would come in every Sunday, without reservation, and expect 'their' table (a four) to be left vacant. I broached the subject of reserving tables with the father when he was paying his bill and he looked at me as if I'd just asked him if he wanted to go down in the beer cellar, let me tie him up, and then play cricket with his balls.

Never got a decent tip either. What is it with people being happy to spend £200 on sunday lunch and a bottle of champagne, but they won't leave 10% for the overworked fuckers on minimum wage who've had to put up with them and their snotty little kids all day, and will have to put up with more once they've left.

Oh great, FB, now I've started ranting.

And that's the industry.

I can't moan too much. As are food isn't shit bar/pub; italian; indian; chinese; or other Swindon shit, and we actually care, we do well. It's better to be small and turning people away than it is to be big an empty.

It's fun too, although tapas often means 2-3 dishes per person. Hard work in the kitchen.

[joteddyred]

"We read about this place on tripadvisor and decided it wasn't for us" 2/5

So they've given a rating without ever being there?  How incredibly sad that somebody would bother to do that?  Totally defeats the purpose of Tripadvisor as well, because it's not a review.

[flammableBen]

So they've given a rating without ever being there?  How incredibly sad that somebody would bother to do that?  Totally defeats the purpose of Tripadvisor as well, because it's not a review.

Actually I made that one up, but some of them are really petty. We did have one that I pretend quoted earlier where they couldn't get a table for two and they gave us 3/5. We complained to tripadvisor that they hadn't actually eaten, but apperently they'd had a "customer service experience".

Fuck that.

Tripadvisor is like a weird game, but one which can affect business. It's weird but if you're on a 4-5 star average, then a few threes really puts you down the table.

[nochee]

And that's the industry.

I can't moan too much. As are food isn't shit bar/pub; italian; indian; chinese; or other Swindon shit, and we actually care, we do well. It's better to be small and turning people away than it is to be big an empty.

It's fun too, although tapas often means 2-3 dishes per person. Hard work in the kitchen.

Yeah, but they are 1/3 of the size so 1/3 of the work per dish. 3 dishes per person = 1 normal dish. Lazy cunt 

[flammableBen]

Yeah, but they are 1/3 of the size so 1/3 of the work per dish. 3 dishes per person = 1 normal dish. Lazy cunt  

But I'm only 2ft tall.

[joteddyred]

I remember a story in the Adver about a place in Old Town (possibly used to be the Kings) where a former employee kept setting up trip advisor accounts and leaving negative reviews.  Their rating dropped from a 5 to a 2 in a couple of weeks.  The manager was desparately trying to get them removed because business was being affected

The unfortunate thing is that we are a nation of moaners.  People are far more likely to take the time to write a negative review.  The majority of people who have a really good experience wouldn't even consider writing a review about it.

Edit:. As proved by this thread being nearly 200 pages longer than the make you smile and feel good one!

[flammableBen]

I remember a story in the Adver about a place in Old Town (possibly used to be the Kings) where a former employee kept setting up trip advisor accounts and leaving negative reviews.  Their rating dropped from a 5 to a 2 in a couple of weeks.  The manager was desparately trying to get them removed because business was being affected

The unfortunate thing is that we are a nation of moaners.  People are far more likely to take the time to write a negative review.  The majority of people who have a really good experience wouldn't even consider writing a review about it.

Edit:. As proved by this thread being nearly 200 pages longer than the make you smile and feel good one!

There's some truth in that, but looking at our tripadvisor page, the majority of reviews are people who've actually been an eaten and thought about what they were saying. It's just the occasional one where you think they've left a review for the sake of doing it.

I guess they are addicted.

[Honkytonk]

And that's the industry.

Yeah, despite my rant, I enjoy the industry. You just have to put up with cunts.

Which, frankly, is pretty true wherever you work, I'm sure.

The unfortunate thing is that we are a nation of moaners.  People are far more likely to take the time to write a negative review.  The majority of people who have a really good experience wouldn't even consider writing a review about it.

Edit:. As proved by this thread being nearly 200 pages longer than the make you smile and feel good one!

The other thing is people rarely complain in person in most places. There's that whole British thing about smiling and pretending stuff's okay. Being a keyboard warrior is a lot easier.

[flammableBen]

The other thing is people rarely complain in person in most places. There's that whole British thing about smiling and pretending stuff's okay. Being a keyboard warrior is a lot easier.

Oh god that's the other thing. I know I'm on a tripavisor rant right now but it works in general. Why would you not say something at the time if you were unhappy. Why sit there, pay, go home and write about it on the internet. Fucks sake.

[flammableBen]

I'm not going to name it on the internet (I told them to their face, doing the opposite), but me and the lady went out for an italian and it wasn't the best. So when they asked "Is everything okay?"

I told them "You shouldn't really just dump lettuce on the side of a plate of lamb stew, gravey and lettuce, it doesn't work" oh and also "Your lasagne tastes blander than mr blobby's cum bubbles"

and that was that.


I didn't moan on tripadvisor, although I should have done.