Benzel
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Posts: 6157
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« Reply #2670 on: Wednesday, September 21, 2011, 15:18:45 » |
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A scum fan insisting Magera is on 7k.
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Is your cat making too much noise all the time?
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herthab
TEF Travel
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Posts: 12020
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« Reply #2671 on: Wednesday, September 21, 2011, 15:54:09 » |
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Finally being 100% debt free, after years of carrying it around like a fucking lead weight!
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It's All Good..............
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Peter Venkman
Past glories motivate us when times are bleak.
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Posts: 64700
Perfection is not attainable
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« Reply #2672 on: Wednesday, September 21, 2011, 16:04:13 » |
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Finally being 100% debt free, after years of carrying it around like a fucking lead weight!
Glad it finally all came through mate, now wheres that Alfa  |
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From the station at Colchester
To the cells of Warrington
From the services at Leicester
To the slums of Northampton
We travel over England
And one day Europe too
Cos we all follow the Swindon
We're the famous Town End crew.
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herthab
TEF Travel
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Posts: 12020
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« Reply #2673 on: Wednesday, September 21, 2011, 16:29:18 » |
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Glad it finally all came through mate, now wheres that Alfa Was talked out of an Alfa mate! Finally decided on a second hand BMW. Nothing flash but a million times better than my 164,000 mile Focus! |
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It's All Good..............
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Matchworn Shirts
For Sale
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Posts: 7424
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« Reply #2674 on: Wednesday, September 21, 2011, 17:21:26 » |
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Being able to watch Somerset in the T20 tournament on German TV
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Sussex
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« Reply #2675 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 07:39:04 » |
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Crumpets.
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Samdy Gray
Dirty sneaky traitor weasel
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Posts: 27180
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« Reply #2676 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 07:47:21 » |
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jayohaitchenn
Wielder of the BANHAMMER
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Posts: 12834
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« Reply #2677 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 10:17:39 » |
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We can call it the CanongateGate scandal  |
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Coca Fola
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« Reply #2678 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 13:26:37 » |
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My grandad won an award for being the oldest working man in Bosnia. He's 82 and still runs his own shoe shop, 6 days a week. If only all these benefit scrounging chavs had the same work ethic as him, the world would be a much better place.
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Coca Fola
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« Reply #2679 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 14:23:08 » |
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Here's his music video appearance.  It's cool that at 2.23 is a family photograph too.
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Batch
Not a Batch
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Posts: 57785
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« Reply #2680 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 14:43:56 » |
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My grandad won an award for being the oldest working man in Bosnia. He's 82 and still runs his own shoe shop, 6 days a week. If only all these benefit scrounging chavs had the same work ethic as him, the world would be a much better place.
That's cool, I just hope to be alive and in full control of my bladder at 82. Here's a song for him:
(yes Nev, its sole, sole). |
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Bogus Dave
Ate my own dick
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Posts: 16467
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« Reply #2681 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 14:50:30 » |
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Finding a book full of raps I wrote when I was in primary school
This one is entitled 'The gay lover'
This is a story about my friend
Who used to be gay
But is now on the the mend
If you see him walking by
Say gay
You'll see a big kid cry
He was twisted, he was bent
But he didn't understand
What his other half meant
When she said "you act gay at school
Get out of my house
you little gay fool"
He may be gay
but what the hey
he aint tried to shag me
so thats okay
so thats the story of my gay friend
but as i said before, he's on the mend
and i heard not long ago
he was trying
to find a love
hopefully it won't be a guy
'cause it is, he will soon die
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Things get better but they never get good
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Samdy Gray
Dirty sneaky traitor weasel
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Posts: 27180
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« Reply #2682 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 14:53:17 » |
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I think that's the single best thing I've ever read on the TEF.
Good work Dave.
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Bogus Dave
Ate my own dick
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Posts: 16467
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« Reply #2683 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 15:10:18 » |
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At the risk of indulging the 11 year old me further, here's a few more
untitled
There's this girl called dianne
i wish she'd hold my hand
i asked her out the night before
but she just looked shocked and slammed the door
so i cried, yes i did
then phoned my mate called sid
he just said look bide your time
and you two will get along just fine
dianne, your the one
dianne, the only one
dianne, can't you see
dianne, you're made for me
i study hard at primary school
but that don't make you cool
i'm always polite, never had a detention
but that don't get a mention
cowboy
Mum - what do you want to be when you grow up?
Me - A cowboy
Mum - A what??
Me - You heard me bitch
I wanna be a cowboy baby
and thats what i wanna be
i wanna be a cowboy baby
so don't push your luck and diss me
i wanna be a cowboy baby
and thats what i'm gonna do
i wanna be a cowboy baby
so shut up before i shoot you
i'm a rootin, lootin, shootin git
shootin all you singers that aint really hip
like n'sync, britney and j-lo
when they're singing, the bogs teh place i wanna go
not to have a crap, but to puke
and when i shot you that wasn't a fluke
now i shoot 50 more times in your head
then thank the lord god that you are dead
now the world seems such a better place
but theirs still me to ruin the human race
i'm the toughest cowboy in the west
my air rifle makes me the best
i don't wanna be the trojan horse in troy
i wanna be a cowboy
before to get the chicks
i always got last picks
becks or owen got the good looking ones
i was getting the minging ones
so i pulled out my gun, bang bang
and everybody wanna join my gang
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Things get better but they never get good
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Coca Fola
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« Reply #2684 on: Thursday, September 22, 2011, 15:54:45 » |
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That's cool, I just hope to be alive and in full control of my bladder at 82.
Here's a song for him:
(yes Nev, its sole, sole).
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