Pages: [1] 2   Go Down
Print
Author Topic: fuckity fuckity cunt cunt.  (Read 3503 times)
flammableBen

« on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 20:18:33 »

If you cut up some chilli's don't scratch your arse without washing your hands. Even if it is a few hours afterwards.

FFS it's not as if I stuck a finger up my bum hole whilst having a wank, it was just the top bit where your butt crack ends and your back starts.

I hope others can learn from my experiences.
Logged
land_of_bo

« Reply #1 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 20:26:44 »

The other day I cut up chillis and was then off out to play snooker. I wear contacts when I play snooker, and only when I play snooker, forgetting to wash hands equalled fucking stingy eyes.

FB, you have my deepest sympathy. Just don't scratch your balls. The skin there is quite thin and that also + a couple of hours of stinging discomfort.
Logged
flammableBen

« Reply #2 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 20:28:47 »

Quote from: "land_of_bo"
The other day I cut up chillis and was then off out to play snooker. I wear contacts when I play snooker, and only when I play snooker, forgetting to wash hands equalled fucking stingy eyes.

FB, you have my deepest sympathy. Just don't scratc your balls. The skin there is quite thin and that also + a couple of hours of stinging discomfort.


I did the balls thing once as well . You thought I would have learnt. This burning has subsided now. Hallelujah!
Logged
Barry Scott

Offline Offline

Posts: 9135




« Reply #3 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 20:31:32 »

I pick my nose all the time. I also cook with Chilli all the time.

Picking your nose after touching chilli leaves a pretty annoying sensation.
Logged
blinkpip
His Infernal Majesty

Offline Offline

Posts: 6761



WWW

Ignore
« Reply #4 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 20:32:22 »

fuck me, it's like the young ones on here.
Logged

ee the trick is only pick on those that can't do you no harm
Like the drummer from Def Leppard's only got one arm

I annoyed Yeovilred 28/01/06
pumbaa
Ha, no cunt in my title anymore. Oh.....

Offline Offline

Posts: 6351


Fartmeister




Ignore
« Reply #5 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 22:44:08 »

Quote from: "Barry Scott"
I pick my nose all the time. I also cook with Chilli all the time.

Picking your nose after touching chilli leaves a pretty annoying sensation.


I'll wager you never suffer from a cold though...
Logged
Fred Elliot
I REST MY FUCKING CASE

Offline Offline

Posts: 15736





Ignore
« Reply #6 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:04:54 »

A classic TEF thread

It should be preserved for ever

Well done Benjamin !

 :toppost:
Logged
Sade

Offline Offline

Posts: 6427





Ignore
« Reply #7 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:06:14 »

 Slightly grosse, very random and very odd.....an ordinary post for FB.ace.
Logged

RED ARMY
pauld
Aaron Aardvark

Offline Offline

Posts: 25436


Absolute Calamity!




Ignore
« Reply #8 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:18:38 »

Fucking class.
Logged
Whits
Morphined Up

Offline Offline

Posts: 8136




« Reply #9 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:23:41 »

ben your my hero  Cool  
Logged

Plays in midfield and his name is Tommy Miller,
signed him from Huddersfield his name is Tommy Miller,
first touch is average but his second is a killer,
heeeeeey Tommy Miller!
BB12

« Reply #10 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:35:34 »

I once rubbed 'Deep Heat' on my lower back and then shortly afterwards scratched my spuds...


Just once mind.......
Logged
Simon Pieman
Original Wanker

Offline Offline

Posts: 36336




« Reply #11 on: Tuesday, February 13, 2007, 23:58:30 »

Quote from: "BB12"
I once rubbed 'Deep Heat' on my lower back and then shortly afterwards scratched my spuds...


Just once mind.......


I know someone who took a piss shortly after warming up before a cricket match. Needless to say we could hear his screaming in the bog from outside
Logged
flammableBen

« Reply #12 on: Wednesday, February 14, 2007, 00:01:03 »

Is deep heat really that bad? I think I've only used it once, the rest of the time I've been to ace to bother. Maybe they should invent some sort of "deep tight moist" gel instead.
Logged
Fred Elliot
I REST MY FUCKING CASE

Offline Offline

Posts: 15736





Ignore
« Reply #13 on: Wednesday, February 14, 2007, 00:03:59 »

Quote from: "flammableBen"
FFS it's not as if I stuck a finger up my bum hole whilst having a wank, it was just the top bit where your butt crack ends and your back starts.


Sorry, but had to highlight this.

This part made me cry tears of pure joy
Logged
Simon Pieman
Original Wanker

Offline Offline

Posts: 36336




« Reply #14 on: Wednesday, February 14, 2007, 00:05:41 »

Ben's bum does that to people
Logged
Pages: [1] 2   Go Up
Print
Jump to: