oxford_fan
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« on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:20:22 » |
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I thought all of my housemates were out last night, so embarked upon an almighty wank.
Pretty soon after the man milk had been released I heard someone in the corridor muttering the world "vulgar" in disdain.
So far, I can see a few options.
1. never go home
2. say i was polishing the window/woodwork
3. when asked what i did last night, reply "I just stayed in and had a massive wank"
I think number three is probably the lesser of the evils.
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tans
You spin me right round baby right round
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« Reply #1 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:21:08 » |
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land_of_bo
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« Reply #2 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:28:21 » |
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Was it your nine o clock wednesday wank?
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janaage
People's Front of Alba
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« Reply #3 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:32:44 » |
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I thought all of my housemates were out last night, so embarked upon an almighty wank.
Pretty soon after the man milk had been released I heard someone in the corridor muttering the world "vulgar" in disdain.
So far, I can see a few options.
1. never go home
2. say i was polishing the window/woodwork
3. when asked what i did last night, reply "I just stayed in and had a massive wank"
I think number three is probably the lesser of the evils.  Brilliant!! That's brought tears of laughter to my face. Are all your housemates male?? I'd go for option 3 fella, ha ha, brilliant! |
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chalkies_shorts
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« Reply #4 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:42:15 » |
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I would have thought that being a Scummer and wanking aren't exactly mutually exclusive, are they?
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oxford_fan
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« Reply #5 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:53:31 » |
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it was a female housmate.
i live with 3 blokes and 3 girls, plus a 'couch surfer' (she doesn't pay rent but cleans, does my washing up and cooks dinner sometimes).
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yeo
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« Reply #6 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 12:55:12 » |
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Who would catch someone having a wank and mutter the word "vulgar"?
Surely your house mates will just take the piss,I know I would.
Its not like they caught you in the living room hanging yourself from a lamp shade with their pants with a Cucumber up your bum is it......
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W56196272
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Colin Todd
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« Reply #7 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:01:48 » |
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best post for ages! Where were you? in the living room? I assume you were watching porn? Does the content of said porn add further comedy to the situation? |
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oxford_fan
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« Reply #8 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:02:54 » |
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i was in my room, and it was an imagination toss
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Arriba
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« Reply #9 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:03:24 » |
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i dont get it?
did anyone actually catch you in the act?
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oxford_fan
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« Reply #10 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:05:14 » |
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not visually, but audibly. i should have put music on. some barry white.
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Batch
Not a Batch
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« Reply #11 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:15:39 » |
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he's a wanker,
he's a wanker,
and it does him good like it bloody well should...
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Arriba
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« Reply #12 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:17:50 » |
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oh a noisy wanker  just ask the girl if she wants to relieve you next time |
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SwindonTartanArmy
Go Team GB!
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London Scottish - More History than Franchise!
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« Reply #13 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:24:55 » |
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Think OF's custom bit under his name should now read "resident scummer, and a wanker to boot!" |
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Vi er best i verden! Vi er best i verden! Vi har slått England 2-1 i fotball!! Det er aldeles utrolig! Vi har slått England! England, kjempers fødeland. Lord Nelson, Lord Beaverbrook, Sir Winston Churchill, Sir Anthony Eden, Clement Attlee, Henry Cooper, Lady Diana--vi har slått dem alle sammen. Vi har slått dem alle sammen. Maggie Thatcher can you hear me?
Your boys took a hell of a beating!"
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STFC4LIFE
Fence Fucker
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« Reply #14 on: Thursday, June 5, 2008, 13:39:08 » |
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Who would catch someone having a wank and mutter the word "vulgar"?
Surely your house mates will just take the piss,I know I would.
Its not like they caught you in the living room hanging yourself from a lamp shade with their pants with a banana up your bum is it...... |
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