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Author Topic: Best man speech  (Read 5142 times)
Sippo
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« on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 08:52:52 »

I've got plenty of time, but throw some idea's at me people. Photo ideas, video ideas, anything really. Got a couple of good lines so far...

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, I hope everyone is enjoying this very special day so far. It’s been an emotional day, ……..even the cake is in tiers

honesty I am actually a little nervous doing this, but I feel a bit comforted by the fact I have actually rehearsed this speech in front of a live audience at the local old peoples home, … I think it went well, they all pissed themselves anyway
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If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you're gonna see some serious shit...
Bob's Orange
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« Reply #1 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:06:08 »

I've got plenty of time, but throw some idea's at me people. Photo ideas, video ideas, anything really. Got a couple of good lines so far...

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, I hope everyone is enjoying this very special day so far. It’s been an emotional day, ……..even the cake is in tiers

honesty I am actually a little nervous doing this, but I feel a bit comforted by the fact I have actually rehearsed this speech in front of a live audience at the local old peoples home, … I think it went well, they all pissed themselves anyway

I heard that tiers one at a wedding years ago. It went down a treat (the joke, not the cake).
I liked the old people's one as well!
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we've been to Aberdeen, we hate the Hibs, they make us spew up, so make some noise,
the gorgie boys, for Hearts in Europe.
tans
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« Reply #2 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:07:03 »

Where is the wedding?

My brother had his in croydon, and his best man said that croydon has never seen so many people in suits apart from when they were attending court.

Childhood stories?
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DMR

« Reply #3 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:11:10 »

The wedding cake one is class
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jutty274

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« Reply #4 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:12:26 »

Don't forget to add some stories about the night with the strippers, even if it never happened. that will always cause a few eyebrows to be raised.
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london_red

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« Reply #5 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:13:57 »

Me and [groom's name] have been through a lot over the years..... unfortunately they couldn't all be here today.
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Sippo
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I ain't gettin on no plane fool




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« Reply #6 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:20:55 »

A lot people show videos etc now, do you think that is too much? Just keep it simple?
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If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you're gonna see some serious shit...
Samdy Gray
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« Reply #7 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:28:11 »

I get nervous talking in front of large groups, so I prepared a few lines... having just snorted them in the gents I feel absolutely fantastic.
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tans
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« Reply #8 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:31:14 »

I get nervous talking in front of large groups, so I prepared a few lines... having just snorted them in the gents I feel absolutely fantastic.

Haha
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otanswell

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« Reply #9 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:31:40 »

My best man thought it would be funny to have this blown up to massive poster size (fancy dress on my stag do):

[url width=537 height=720]http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/76866_454043208977_505013977_5499569_4333379_n.jpg[/url]
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« Reply #10 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:39:14 »

I said something like Nick was very nervous this morning in fact you should have seen what he left in the bog. I then gave him a brick, seemed to get a few laughs. Also my open line was "Ladies and Gentlemen, Fornication" <pause look at notes> sorry for an occasion.... got a few laughs too.

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Bewster

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« Reply #11 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 09:47:44 »

I like - " Talking in public is a bit like being asked to have sex with the queen, its a great honour but you'd rather not do it"
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suttonred

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« Reply #12 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 11:16:43 »

My opener was reading from an A4 on memories from the stag night. Which i then screwed up and threw away.
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4D
That was definately my last game, honest

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« Reply #13 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 12:49:15 »

You could ask the groom if you could now have all your porn back.
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[email protected]

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« Reply #14 on: Tuesday, March 6, 2012, 14:46:28 »

The other ones I remember...

When getting up from your chair and about to start - "Thats the second time today i've got off a nice warm seat with paper in my hand"

The farther of the bride isn't so much loosing his daughter, but rather gaining a bathroom

When Dave told me he was marrying the love of his life, I wondered if it was leagal to marry the whole of Swindon Town FC.
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