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Smells like Dave Syrett
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« on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 08:51:27 » |
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DVinho has hit out at the quality of his mum's dinners in comparison to last year, and insists you should look no further than the loss of the George Foreman Grill back in August to explain the drop in standards.
The Royal Mail worker, who was born with rolling eyes, told us "The George Foreman Grill broke down last year and was never replaced. I made it clear that it would be a huge mistake not to replace it, but mother said we would manage without. I wrote the word 'Cunt' in red felt tip across a photo of her in the lounge, but she didn't get the message."
DVinho also pointed to some stats that he says prove his point "Take a look at the meat to veg ratio on this dinner I've got in front of me. There's 3 Dinobites to 5 bits of broccoli! Last year we'd have had 5 Dinobites to 3 bits of Broccoli. You can't make those sort of changes and expect no one to notice."
"Last year we were able to enhance our tea time experience with Heinz ketchup, this year it's Tesco Value. It's a joke!"
Mrs DVinho responded angrily to the criticism by telling the former Nationwide employee to "fuck off and get your only bloody place, so I don't have to cook your bloody tea. You're in your mid-twenties for christ's sake."
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Arriba
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Posts: 21305
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« Reply #1 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 08:54:51 » |
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hahaha.good work
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pauld
Aaron Aardvark
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Posts: 25436
Absolute Calamity!
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« Reply #2 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 09:09:11 » |
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Ha ha ha. Superb
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Peter Venkman
Past glories motivate us when times are bleak.
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Posts: 64756
Perfection is not attainable
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« Reply #3 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 09:24:13 » |
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Thats fucking brilliant!
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From the station at Colchester
To the cells of Warrington
From the services at Leicester
To the slums of Northampton
We travel over England
And one day Europe too
Cos we all follow the Swindon
We're the famous Town End crew.
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Peter Venkman
Past glories motivate us when times are bleak.
Offline
Posts: 64756
Perfection is not attainable
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« Reply #4 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 09:25:19 » |
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Oh and by the way Ben thats an interesting new Profile name!
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From the station at Colchester
To the cells of Warrington
From the services at Leicester
To the slums of Northampton
We travel over England
And one day Europe too
Cos we all follow the Swindon
We're the famous Town End crew.
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Langers
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Posts: 4240
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« Reply #5 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 10:25:05 » |
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Haha. Good work.
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Nemo
Shit Bacon
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Posts: 23620
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« Reply #6 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 10:27:53 » |
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DV's Mum out!
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BANGKOK RED
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« Reply #7 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 10:31:38 » |
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He's got a point though. Tesco's value ketchup is rank!
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pauld
Aaron Aardvark
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Posts: 25436
Absolute Calamity!
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« Reply #8 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:08:50 » |
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He's got a point though. Tesco's value ketchup is rank!
We have to cut our cloth accordingly. It's not use going out lashing out on glamour ketchup if the budget won't allow for it. It might seem satisfying in the short term but ultimately it leads to the kind of financial disaster that results in even harsher cutbacks being made on the DinoBites front. And nobody wants that |
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Nemo
Shit Bacon
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Posts: 23620
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« Reply #9 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:13:25 » |
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I thought our plan was to buy promising young Ketchup brands and sell them on later?
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mrverve
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Posts: 1429
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« Reply #10 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:18:19 » |
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The cutlery is to blame, they're not getting behind the condiments enough.
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reeves4england
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Posts: 16128
We'll never die!
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« Reply #11 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:21:16 » |
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I think it's clear that the real issue lies in the crockery - it just doesn't provide a strong enough foundation for the DinoBites to fulfil their potential.
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BANGKOK RED
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« Reply #12 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:27:21 » |
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If the DinoBites need crockery to fulfil their potential, they can fuck off back to where they came from.
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Jamiesfuturewife
Cats is nature
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« Reply #13 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:34:38 » |
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DV
Has also heard this
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Posts: 33906
Joseph McLaughlin
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« Reply #14 on: Thursday, March 10, 2011, 11:58:37 » |
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I bought my own place and moved out 16 months ago!
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