Colemanballs-esque

[Doore]

"If you have intercourse you run the risk of dying and the ramifications of death are final." — Cyndi Lauper
"Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost an important part of your life." — Brooke Shields

“Hawaii is a unique state. It is a small state. It is a state that is by itself. It is a… it is different from the other 49 states. Well, all states are different, but it's got a particularly unique situation” - Dan Quayle

 "I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."  George "Dubya" Bush

"Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?"  George "Dubya" Bush

After playing Cameroon in the 1990 world cup finals: "We didn't underestimate them. They were just a lot better than we thought"- Bobby Robson

Better make it six, I can't eat eight."- Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked if he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices

I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Heather Whitestone, Miss Alabama. In the 1994 Miss USA contest, when asked if she would want to live forever

"Whenever I watch TV and I see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I would love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- Mariah Carey, Pop Singer

If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate."
- Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.

Reports are sketchy, but we have heard that in the first heart transplant operation in Belgium, both patient and donor are doing fine."
- Radio news announcer

"Solutions are not the answer."
- Richard Nixon, former U.S. President

[Ginginho]

Whenever I watch TV and I see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I would love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff

Haha, I can't believe this one is true.

[BANGKOK RED]

Dubbya rules this thread


"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."


...George W. Bush
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."


...Governor George W. Bush

"Welcome to Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts."


...Governor George W. Bush

"Mars is essentially in the same orbit...Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."


...Governor George W. Bush, 8/11/94

"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."


...Governor George W. Bush, 9/15/95

"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy -- but that could change."


...Governor George W. Bush, 5/22/98

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and thatone word is 'to be prepared'."


...Governor George W. Bush, 12/6/93

"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."


...Governor George W. Bush, 11/30/96

"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future."


...Governor George W. Bush

"The future will be better tomorrow."


...Governor George W. Bush

"We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."


...Governor George W. Bush 9/21/97

"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history."


...Governor George W. Bush

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."


...Governor George W. Bush to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93

"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."


...Governor George W. Bush

"Public speaking is very easy."


...Governor George W. Bush to reporters

"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican"
...Governor George W. Bush

"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."


...Governor George W. Bush

"When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in LA, my answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame."


...George W. Bush

"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it."


...Governor George W. Bush 5/20/96

"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."


...Governor George W. Bush 9/22/97

"For NASA, space is still a high priority."


...Governor George W. Bush, 9/5/93

"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."


...Governor George W. Bush , 9/18/95

"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that George Bush may or may not make."


...Governor George W. Bush

"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made."


...Governor George W. Bush

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."


...Governor George W. Bush

"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."

[Benzel]

That has given me a headache.

[Samdy Gray]

Another George Bush favourite of mine: "A lot of people misunderestimate me."

[bassett boy]

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles - Ronald Regan

[BANGKOK RED]

Dubbya - again

"For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it."

[jimmy_onions]

Haha, I can't believe this one is true.

I concur, this cannot be true, seriously?

I like the baseball pitcher one as well, I would wager that was an intentional pun.

However, onto the master, George Dubya...all quality, but you missed his all time best...

"the problem with the French is, they don't have a word for entrepreneur"

(unless that is an urban myth!?)

[Batch]

"the problem with the French is, they don't have a word for entrepreneur"

(unless that is an urban myth!?)

http://www.snopes.com/quotes/bush.asp booo. It sounded so plausibe

[thedarkprince]

[4D]

Not quite along the lines of the thread but I always chuckle at the "What's in the box" clip from It'll be alright on the night. I don't know how to add the link though 

[thedarkprince]

If it's youtube just paste the link in and hey presto.

[reeves4england]

This one?

[4D]

 

Ta.

[Barnard]

Thankyou for that. That really put a smile on my face this morning.