The random pre-match story thread.

[BANGKOK RED]

One afternoon after having a blue with the misses, I thought it best to get out of the house for a bit and found myself in an Irish pub, and so of course a cool pint of Guinness was the order of the day.

They had a promotion on at the time and with each Guinness I received a scratch card. I scratched the card to find that I had won a dead cool Guinness candle, basically a candle in the size, shape and colours of a pint of Guinness. After eating the food that I ordered I decided on another Guinness, and with the accompanying scratch card I won yet again, another dead cool Guinness candle.

With the staff looking at me clearly thinking was a miserable cunt I must be (I was in a bad mood), and the uncomfortable feeling of being on my tod in a busy pub I thought it best to leave and head back home to face the music of the domestic dispute.

Upon arrival back home I found that some cunt had been stiring the shite, suggesting to my misses that I had gone out to fuck some whore, which was blatantly a lie. And upon looking down to the floor thinking "What do I do here then" what do I see but my two glorious Guinness candles along with the scratch cards which was evidence enough that I was not in a whore bar at all, those candles very quickly diffused a potentially very volatile situation I can tell thee.

I still have those candles, one is on it's last legs after being agressively exploited for its constant flame whilst smoking narcs. The other is still intact though and still in its wrapper, perhaps in preparation for my next phase of self destructive substance abuse.

Just thought I'd share that with you instead of simply complaining of being so cunting well B.O.R.E.D. tonight.

[flammableBen]

You should have found a whore bar which sold Guinness.

[BANGKOK RED]

Tis gonna be a quiet one here tonight, innit!

[Sussex]

Tis gonna be a quiet one here tonight, innit!

I'm here.

What's the time difference between England and Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Ayuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Bur?

[BANGKOK RED]

Tis gonna be a quiet one here tonight, innit!

I'm here.

What's the time difference between England and Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Ayuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Bur?

I am 7 hours ahead,

The full name is: Krungthep Mahanakorn Boworn Rattanakosin Mahintharayuttha Mahadilokpop Noparatratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniveymahasathan Amornpiman Avatransathit Sakkathattiay-avisnukarmprasit.

Which translates to: "Great city of angels; the repository of divine gems; the great land unconquerable; the grand and prominent realm; the royal and delightful capital full of nine noble gems; the highest royal dwelling and grand palace; the divine shelter and living place of reincarnated spirits."

Thank fuck they just abbreviate it to "Krungthep"

Thought that I should share that little snippet with you also.

[flammableBen]

Swindon's full name is

Swindon Hanglo Flapiton Spnelblo Fligey Squalebob Bobblebod-Dop Squip Squip Squip Squip Jarno-Jeferzi Jashewlo Zavak-Zazam Simbono Simbono Plop.

Nobody knows what it means, but it's rumoured that spoken out loud the words could stop the mighty leviathan when the end comes.

[Sussex]

Late night tonight for Bangkok Red then!

[BANGKOK RED]

Late night tonight for Bangkok Red then!

Fucking Hardcore me, GO BR!!!!!

Gotta have a "Pleasure the misses" break now though.

[reeves4england]

Late night tonight for Bangkok Red then!

Fucking Hardcore me, GO BR!!!!!

Gotta have a "Pleasure the misses" break now though.

Misses? How many have you got?  

[Sussex]

Swindon's full name is

Swindon Hanglo Flapiton Spnelblo Fligey Squalebob Bobblebod-Dop Squip Squip Squip Squip Jarno-Jeferzi Jashewlo Zavak-Zazam Simbono Simbono Plop.

Nobody knows what it means, but it's rumoured that spoken out loud the words could stop the mighty leviathan when the end comes.

Think it roughly translates as "Chavy cum dump slappers are readily available at the bottom of town every night".

[flammableBen]

woot

[BANGKOK RED]

Late night tonight for Bangkok Red then!

Fucking Hardcore me, GO BR!!!!!

Gotta have a "Pleasure the misses" break now though.

Misses? How many have you got?  

One is enough and she is satisfied now, go me again.

[Colin Todd]

Swindon's full name is

Swindon Hanglo Flapiton Spnelblo Fligey Squalebob Bobblebod-Dop Squip Squip Squip Squip Jarno-Jeferzi Jashewlo Zavak-Zazam Simbono Simbono Plop.

Nobody knows what it means, but it's rumoured that spoken out loud the words could stop the mighty leviathan when the end comes.

Think it roughly translates as "Chavy cum dump slappers are readily available at the bottom of town every night".

how dare you

[Fred Elliot]

I found that some cunt had been stiring the shite, suggesting to my misses that I had gone out to fuck some whore,

Name ?

Location ?

Ill sort it

[DMR]

I found that some cunt had been stiring the shite, suggesting to my misses that I had gone out to fuck some whore,

Name ?

Location ?

Ill sort it

I'm guessing this was years ago Frederico  


Or have I just had a whoosh moment...