Ralphy
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« on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 09:46:38 » |
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John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!"
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night" She said, "Aye, did ya now. And what was your
toast?"
John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."
"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."
She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised meself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."
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land_of_bo
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« Reply #1 on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 13:09:24 » |
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A game warden finds a man at a popular trout fishing spot with two dozen trout swimming in a bucket. "That's way over the limit," he says. "You're under arrest." "But officer, please," the man says, "these are my pet fish from home. I just bring them down here to let them swim free once a week. When I whistle, they all come back and get into the bucket to go home." "I don't believe it," says the warden. "Show me." The man promptly dumps the trout into the stream and gazes after them as they swim away. After a minute, the warden says, "OK, how long?" "How long what?" says the man. "How long till you call the fish back?" "What fish?" Who does that sound like?  |
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Samdy Gray
Dirty sneaky traitor weasel
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« Reply #2 on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 13:14:22 » |
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I don't get it  |
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land_of_bo
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« Reply #3 on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 13:15:11 » |
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"There are no fish"
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Ralphy
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« Reply #4 on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 13:28:42 » |
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The warden can't arrest him now cos he has no fish in the bucket.
Not bad.
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Bennett
No Comment
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« Reply #5 on: Tuesday, May 1, 2007, 16:35:05 » |
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The warden can't arrest him now cos he has no fish in the bucket.
Not bad. i love you ralph |
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This is the water.
And this is the well.
Drink full and descend.
The horse is the white of the eyes and dark within.
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Ralphy
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« Reply #6 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:19:58 » |
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I have another joke but it's racist.
I wish i could say it on here.
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Ginginho
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« Reply #7 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:20:43 » |
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Just say it Ralph, it's just a joke, you didn't make it up, just repeating it.
If it makes it easier, I have a cat thats racist.
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Ralphy
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« Reply #8 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:22:27 » |
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Sonic will come down on me like a ton of bricks and ban me.
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sonic youth
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« Reply #9 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:23:18 » |
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will I fuck.
niggers=scum
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Ralphy
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« Reply #10 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:23:58 » |
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Ralphy
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« Reply #11 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:44:25 » |
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I know a p*** who's name is Jim
And i just love to lob tomotoes at him
Tomotoes are soft and don't hurt the skin
But these fuckers do cos there still in the tin!!
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red macca
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« Reply #12 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:47:07 » |
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You built us up for that :?
You are rubbish ralph get out
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Ralphy
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« Reply #13 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:47:43 » |
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red macca
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« Reply #14 on: Wednesday, May 2, 2007, 21:49:52 » |
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Why do pakis smell?
so blind people can hate them too.
Sorry :|
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