The question you've all been afraid to ask

[Boeta]

If you were a pieman would you buy a shop or trawl the streets as a mobile pieman?

[Simon Pieman]

neither, i would sell on ebay

[Boeta]

I think one of the key things of being a pieman is customer interaction.

Plus, you wouldn't get fresh pies if you bought them off EBay.

Fresh pies are so important. To everyone. Even Scotsmen I'm told.

[Simon Pieman]

taking the costs of running a shop into account, i would become a mobile pieman. Eventually it would become so successful I would employ other piemen too. This would mean I could bring pies to the masses.

It would soon expand across the entire west county, broaden towards the east, and then spreading up as far as north of the border feeding those fresh pies to every hungry scotsman.

Wales would be taken over in a day, as would n.ireland. In a matter of days the Rep. of Ireland would to succumb to the delicacy of my pies and settle their differences with their northern counterparts.

Soon enough these fuckin pies would be everywhere, all over the world. India would declare their national dish as the pie, as would italy.

Pie domination would be mine within a year, and much like microsoft, i would own a monopoly on the entire fast food industry.

[Boeta]

On your mobile stall wuld you have one half for meat pies and the other for savoury? That's how I would do it.

It would be a struggle for fit in more than 30 or so pies into a stall though. My stall wouldn't be one of the crappy ones like burger people have, it would be more a stall that old fashioned ice cream sellers have. It might not make as much money but there's a touch more class there.

I don't think such an aggressive appraoch is the key to selling pies on the street, perhaps you need to jovial, fat man to front the company whilst you are the brains behind it.

[Simon Pieman]

I don't think such an aggressive appraoch is the key to selling pies on the street, perhaps you need to jovial, fat man to front the company whilst you are the brains behind it.

any takers?

[sonicyouth]

I don't think such an aggressive appraoch is the key to selling pies on the street, perhaps you need to jovial, fat man to front the company whilst you are the brains behind it.

What if said fat man eats all the pies though?

[Boeta]

Then you'd be in trouble

[jim]

I don't think such an aggressive appraoch is the key to selling pies on the street, perhaps you need to jovial, fat man to front the company whilst you are the brains behind it.

any takers?

Sounds too simple, Simon

[Simon Pieman]

the name i use on here is not only due to my name rhyming with pieman.

One day many many years ago, in primary school in fact, we acted out nursey rhymes (don't ask me why). Ironically, i was made to play the pieman.

Happy memories  

[Boeta]

If this fat, jovial man were to eat all the pies (I'm sure he wouldn't though) perhaps we could take a leaf out of FW Taylor's book and pay him by piecework. Or piework in fact. So for every 20 pies he sells he gets one meat pie and one savoury.

[sonicyouth]

Boeta, I like your business acumen. Would you like to start a pie business with me? You do all the work of course, I spend the cash.

[Boeta]

I thought to myself... the first thing we need to do is to find this fat, jovial man.

Then it came to me. Which famous, jovial man who would help up to build up an excellent brand image is available 364 days a year?

Santa Claus of course.

I'll send a letter up the chimney around Christmas time.

[sonicyouth]

What about jase? He's not fat or jovial but I think he must be unemployed.

[strooood]

i was thinking andy king.

boeta, surely meat pies are savoury?