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Author Topic: Christmas Jokes  (Read 1679 times)
strooood
As black as Patrick from EastEnders who is officially the blackest man on the planet.

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« Reply #15 on: Thursday, December 22, 2005, 18:04:30 »

Quote from: "sade"
What do you call a reigndeer with one eye ?

No-eye-deer .

(must be the shittest christmas joke I have ever heard Cheesy )


what do you call a reindeer with no eyes AND no legs

still no idea
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officially blacker than the night.
DV
Has also heard this

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Joseph McLaughlin




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« Reply #16 on: Friday, December 23, 2005, 14:50:16 »

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.  The letter read,

      Dear God,

      I am an 83-year-old widow, living on a very small pension.  Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had  £100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension day. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope.  Can you please help me?

      Sincerely

      Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few quid. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected  £96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened, It read:

      Dear God,

      How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends.  We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

      By the way, there was  £4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving b*stards at the Post Office.

      Sincerely

      Edna
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land_of_bo

« Reply #17 on: Friday, December 23, 2005, 14:54:56 »

Why does santa have 3 gardens?









So he can hoe hoe hoe....


sorry
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STFCBird
Ralphy's Wet Dream

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« Reply #18 on: Friday, December 23, 2005, 15:02:55 »

Quote from: "land_of_bo"
Why does santa have 3 gardens?









So he can hoe hoe hoe....


sorry


I was just gonna post that one  :twisted:
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land_of_bo

« Reply #19 on: Friday, December 23, 2005, 15:19:21 »

Why is getting Christmas presents for your kids just like a day at the office?















You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
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