There's a "Why oh why" rant in the Mail today (it's in the kitchen at work, so I like to cheer myself up occasionally by flicking through it so I can feel superior

) about Bill Oddie's double entendres on SpringWatch causing parents to switch over "in droves" apparently. One of the many things you see in the papers which causes you to shout out loud "GET .... A FUCKING ....... GRIP".