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Author Topic: If you've seen them before don't tell me  (Read 1412 times)
jim

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« on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 17:30:42 »

Taken from Radio & TV Shows

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman: What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and
'cheesemongers'?
Contestant: Homosexuals.
Paxman: No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very
upset with you.

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston: There's a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between
your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm.
White: Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
Contestant: Strong.
White: Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant: Louis.
White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy?
Contestant: France
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country
is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris .

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all
written books about their experiences in what: prison, or the
Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party.

GWR FM ( Bristol )
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

RTE RADIO 2FM ( IRELAND )
Presenter: What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The ..?
Caller: Mohicans.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIOMANCHESTER)
Phil: What's 11 squared?
Contestant: I don't know.
Phil: I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY
Leslie: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er . . .
Leslie: He makes bread . .
Contestant: Er . .
Leslie: He makes cakes . . .
Contestant: Kipling Street ?

LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain.

ROCK FM ( PRESTON )
Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.
Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
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Reg Smeeton
Walking Encyclopaedia

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« Reply #1 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 17:43:54 »

Anne Robinson: Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all
written books about their experiences in what: prison, or the
Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party

  Ha ha....stupid or what everyone knows Oscar Wilde was never in the Conservative Party.
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leefer

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« Reply #2 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 17:50:58 »

Reading jail i think Mr Wilde was at....thats Oscar not Marty!
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Fred Elliot
I REST MY FUCKING CASE

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« Reply #3 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 18:00:59 »

They are ace Jim

Thanks for that.........................made I smile
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reeves4england

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« Reply #4 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 18:08:53 »

I don't know the names of any countries in Spain

 Soapy Tit Wank

Gotta wonder why we bother with the free education for all thing  Tongue
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strooood
As black as Patrick from EastEnders who is officially the blackest man on the planet.

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« Reply #5 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 18:15:08 »

seen em before  
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officially blacker than the night.
jim

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« Reply #6 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 18:26:25 »

Quote from: "strooood"
seen em before  


There goes another rib
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sonic youth

« Reply #7 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 18:35:20 »

i've not seen them before, very good  Cheesy
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strooood
As black as Patrick from EastEnders who is officially the blackest man on the planet.

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« Reply #8 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 22:59:03 »

Quote from: "jim"
Quote from: "strooood"
seen em before  


There goes another rib


what did you call me
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officially blacker than the night.
axs
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« Reply #9 on: Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 23:00:14 »

a rigid inflatable boat?
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flammableBen

« Reply #10 on: Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 00:55:51 »

Are you a sailor Axs? I didn't think they let gingers into the navy. Something to do with ginger being visible on radar or something.
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axs
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« Reply #11 on: Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 07:49:58 »

That's right they don't.  Sad
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fatbury

« Reply #12 on: Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 08:55:46 »

DUHHHHHHH!
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axs
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« Reply #13 on: Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 17:45:23 »

Quote from: "fatbury of red jumper fame"
DUHHHHHHH!


thank you for your input.
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