Pages: 1 ... 51 52 53 [54]   Go Down
Print
Author Topic: Friday Joke Thread  (Read 217889 times)
BambooToTheFuture

Offline Offline

Posts: 10081


I'll Tell Ya Now - McGurk Is The New Graham


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #795 on: Wednesday, December 23, 2020, 18:17:40 »

How do you make a pirate furious?

Take P out of him.

What do you call a bunch of vermin stuck on an island only 3.14 paces away from the hidden treasure? 

Pi-rats of the Caribbean...
Woot Jumping
Logged


'Incessant Nonsense'

______________________________________________________________

'I'm gonna tell you the secret.
There's a threat, you end it and you don't feel ashamed about enjoying it.
You smell the gunpowder and you see the blood, you know what that means?
It means you're alive. You've won.
You take the heads so that you don't ever forget.'
Peter Venkman
We don't need no stinking badges.

Offline Offline

Posts: 58868


Back Off Man, I’m A Scientist.



« Reply #796 on: Thursday, December 24, 2020, 07:14:56 »

What do you call a bunch of vermin stuck on an island only 3.14 paces away from the hidden treasure?  

Pi-rats of the Caribbean...
Woot Jumping

In Jamaica you can get a steak and kidney pie for £1.75, a chicken and mushroom pie for £1.60 and an apple pie for £2.15. In St Kitts and Nevis a steak and kidney pie will cost you £2, a chicken pie is £1.70 and a cherry pie can be yours for £1.95. In Trinidad and Tobago, that steak and kidney pie comes in at £2.50, but you can buy two for £3.50, while the chicken and mushroom pie is £2.25, or two for £3.25. They also offer meat and potato pie for £2, or two for £3. Their apple pies and cherry pies are often sold for £2.75, or two (any combination) for £4.75.'

Those are the Pie Rates of the Caribbean.
Logged

Only a fool does not know when to hold his tongue.
Peter Venkman
We don't need no stinking badges.

Offline Offline

Posts: 58868


Back Off Man, I’m A Scientist.



« Reply #797 on: Thursday, December 24, 2020, 07:17:37 »

And as its Christmas Eve....

Logged

Only a fool does not know when to hold his tongue.
BambooToTheFuture

Offline Offline

Posts: 10081


I'll Tell Ya Now - McGurk Is The New Graham


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #798 on: Friday, December 25, 2020, 02:25:17 »

In Jamaica you can get a steak and kidney pie for £1.75, a chicken and mushroom pie for £1.60 and an apple pie for £2.15. In St Kitts and Nevis a steak and kidney pie will cost you £2, a chicken pie is £1.70 and a cherry pie can be yours for £1.95. In Trinidad and Tobago, that steak and kidney pie comes in at £2.50, but you can buy two for £3.50, while the chicken and mushroom pie is £2.25, or two for £3.25. They also offer meat and potato pie for £2, or two for £3. Their apple pies and cherry pies are often sold for £2.75, or two (any combination) for £4.75.'

Those are the Pie Rates of the Caribbean.


Ahh excellent...consequently...In Jamaica every 1 in 3 people wear hats but only 1 in 6 do so in St.Kitts & Nevis. Over in T&T it is 1 in 4 hats.

As statistics show, these are the most accurate figures for the Per Hats of the Caribbean.
« Last Edit: Monday, December 28, 2020, 19:56:42 by bamboonoshop » Logged


'Incessant Nonsense'

______________________________________________________________

'I'm gonna tell you the secret.
There's a threat, you end it and you don't feel ashamed about enjoying it.
You smell the gunpowder and you see the blood, you know what that means?
It means you're alive. You've won.
You take the heads so that you don't ever forget.'
BambooToTheFuture

Offline Offline

Posts: 10081


I'll Tell Ya Now - McGurk Is The New Graham


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #799 on: Monday, December 28, 2020, 19:58:44 »

Some cunt stole my favourite block of cheese the other day.
I have no idea it is but it really fucking grates on me.
Logged


'Incessant Nonsense'

______________________________________________________________

'I'm gonna tell you the secret.
There's a threat, you end it and you don't feel ashamed about enjoying it.
You smell the gunpowder and you see the blood, you know what that means?
It means you're alive. You've won.
You take the heads so that you don't ever forget.'
BambooToTheFuture

Offline Offline

Posts: 10081


I'll Tell Ya Now - McGurk Is The New Graham


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #800 on: Saturday, June 12, 2021, 22:41:48 »

Had my covid vaccine the other day...

Got home, chilled out, booted the dial-up for about 15mins and bought 87 copies of Windows Me...
Logged


'Incessant Nonsense'

______________________________________________________________

'I'm gonna tell you the secret.
There's a threat, you end it and you don't feel ashamed about enjoying it.
You smell the gunpowder and you see the blood, you know what that means?
It means you're alive. You've won.
You take the heads so that you don't ever forget.'
Ginginho

Offline Offline

Posts: 6848





Ignore
« Reply #801 on: Sunday, June 13, 2021, 05:39:14 »

I opened my wardrobe this morning and was greeted by a lion. I ask him what he was doing there.
"Narnia Business" he responded.
Logged
BambooToTheFuture

Offline Offline

Posts: 10081


I'll Tell Ya Now - McGurk Is The New Graham


WWW

Ignore
« Reply #802 on: Friday, April 8, 2022, 15:01:56 »

I always knew Jesus was fantastic at puzzles. Especially the Times Crossword...

He's just nailed 2 across.
Logged


'Incessant Nonsense'

______________________________________________________________

'I'm gonna tell you the secret.
There's a threat, you end it and you don't feel ashamed about enjoying it.
You smell the gunpowder and you see the blood, you know what that means?
It means you're alive. You've won.
You take the heads so that you don't ever forget.'
Pages: 1 ... 51 52 53 [54]   Go Up
Print
Jump to: