I wasn't drunk, just desperate!
Sheffield.... We rattle up there to get there 10pm on a Sunday night and instantly hit the beers in a deserted Spoons til about 12am, til I persuade my mates to hit a club. We go into a club and yet again I miss a golden opportunity to pull by being a pussy, yet my mates dive in there (

).
On the way out, we pass a helta skelta with a big metal fence surrounding it. While I was taking a leak, my mate (who's a big fucker) lifts up the fence and the Sheffield-"local" climbs under and starts climbing up the helta skelta. I followed suit, scaling the fence and scratching my arm (stings like a bitch still) and watched as the guy threw a securty light at me (big thing, makes a huge noise). Next thing we know someone's having a go at him, before the police arrive. We leg it with the policecar literally inches from my legs. My mate being a bit naive started heading for main roads, but I dragged him through some bollards and down a flight of steps fortunately losing them. If I'd been caught I'd have been fucked after what happened in Brighton - was fucking stupid going over the fence, fuck knows how I thought I was gonna go on the helta skelta - I'm scared of heights anyway.
We must have sprinted at least 400m.... I thought my lungs were going to implode. Then last night I slept on the couch of some random's kitchen as my mate kicked me out because he thought I was after his ex-girlfriend (not in the slightest bit interested). Now I read this back he sounds like a real cunt, but he is a genuinely really decent bloke!