suttonred
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« Reply #21855 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 19:16:50 » |
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You've got an odd family, bud...
I could recount dozens upon dozens of mental episodes. Unfortunately I'm normally the common denominator, mainly in an innocent capacity. The naked Christmas morning barbecue was all my own work though 
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Chubbs
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Posts: 10517
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« Reply #21856 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 22:30:38 » |
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Had the wife's cousins over Saturday, her female one bought here new husband. they got here 5.30, the husband caned a bottle of JD before 7 and promptly fell flat on his back. We put him om the sofa for a kip, next thing we hear is "hurry he's naked and trying to piss on the xmas tree". He gets dragged to the toilet shreddies round his ankles no damage done... He then decides he wants more booze which i'm reluctant to, and give him neat coke. After the same story 3 times he disappears and we find him completely naked trying to wet the xmas tree again. I said to his wife she either puts him to bed or he's out. We'd shown them where the spare room is, but the silly cow puts him naked into our bed. I hoof him out and he's moaning he cant find his pants. Anyway it calms down he gets put to bed in the correct room, and then we embark on a cleaning/bed changing spree. (not the wife though..) All calm now, until I get up in the morning and find the greedy fucker has got up at 5am and eaten all the bacon and the bread. On top of that We're still finding things he's fallen on and broken 2 days later, needless to say his first and last visit to Chez Sutton..
It's always nervous meeting the family of your wife.
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Talk Talk
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« Reply #21857 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:19:45 » |
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Why do some blokes have that odd pissing thing when drunk? Sure, when caught short an alleyway sometimes has to suffice, but I've heard of wardrobes being used, drawers and so on.
Yup, I've done a wardrobe before. In a completely rat faced state you CAN mistake it for the bog door, believe me...
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Ells
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Posts: 3451
I am 32 now
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« Reply #21858 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:20:17 » |
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I have been to football matches - with broken limbs - with no money - when it's taken more than 8 hours to get there - when I've had to take 3 coaches - with pneumonia
And in a few days time I'll be missing a game for the grand reason that.. The trains aren't running. There's fuck all wrong with me and nothing I can do about it. Shitcunts.
Public service eh.
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If Don Rogers were alive today, he'd be turning in his grave
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Talk Talk
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« Reply #21859 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:22:05 » |
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I have been to football matches - with broken limbs - with no money - when it's taken more than 8 hours to get there - when I've had to take 3 coaches - with pneumonia
And in a few days time I'll be missing a game for the grand reason that.. The trains aren't running. There's fuck all wrong with me and nothing I can do about it. Shitcunts.
Public service eh.
I think that you really do need to take driving lessons honey
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Ells
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Posts: 3451
I am 32 now
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« Reply #21860 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:24:09 » |
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I think that you really do need to take driving lessons honey
I'm not supposed to drive and I could never afford it anyway. A few people have offered to drive me down actually but I could never accept that!
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If Don Rogers were alive today, he'd be turning in his grave
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Talk Talk
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« Reply #21861 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:24:59 » |
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I'm not supposed to drive and I could never afford it anyway. A few people have offered to drive me down actually but I could never accept that!
 I will come and get you 
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Ells
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Posts: 3451
I am 32 now
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« Reply #21862 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:27:12 » |
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You know I don't live in Calne, right? 
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If Don Rogers were alive today, he'd be turning in his grave
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Talk Talk
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« Reply #21863 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:30:33 » |
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You know I don't live in Calne, right?  Yes... I like the Gower so could take that in before I pick you up? It's only fifteen minutes down the M4 if you believe Jayo and his "mid life crisis mobile" thang  This one:
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Ells
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Posts: 3451
I am 32 now
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« Reply #21864 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:33:47 » |
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That, to me, is a green car. No more or less  I'm genuinely annoyed by it. (The lack of trains not that car)
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If Don Rogers were alive today, he'd be turning in his grave
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Talk Talk
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« Reply #21865 on: Tuesday, December 22, 2015, 23:36:19 » |
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I'm genuinely annoyed by it. (The lack of trains not that car)
Ah Ells, I could bore you with trains for hours. Are you sure about the lack of? Skype is your friend 
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jayohaitchenn
Wielder of the BANHAMMER
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Posts: 12832
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« Reply #21866 on: Wednesday, December 23, 2015, 09:24:05 » |
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Tragic
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DRS
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« Reply #21867 on: Wednesday, December 23, 2015, 09:27:19 » |
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Oh dear
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Leggett
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Posts: 7860
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« Reply #21868 on: Wednesday, December 23, 2015, 09:44:26 » |
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It sometimes feels like we're enabling the dirty old man. 
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Fuck you Leggett, fuck you.
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« Reply #21869 on: Wednesday, December 23, 2015, 09:58:15 » |
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Single or two word sentences.
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