Feeling Guilty.

[Spud]

Condolences go out to you and your family herthab.  

[Batch]

I'm sorry to hear that Herthab. Condolences to you and yours.

On the still wanting to go tomorrow thing, I think it is just human nature to want a release from thinking about everything. It's like you need time out to take it all in. Go if you want to and don't feel bad about it - it doesn't mean you don't care. You will grieve in your own way and in your own time.

That's what I think anyway.

[Give us an S]

My condolences to you are your family. Go out and enjoy tomorrow, im sure he would have wanted it.

[DV]

Sorry to hear that, losing someone is never nice  

Do what you think is best.....

It may sound cliche but I expect he would want you to go out and enjoy yourself and celebrate promotion....

[Simon Pieman]

Right I'm not sure how to put this because it's really fucking dumb and I'm half cut.


When my Dad died in the summer of lung cancer it was rather sudden and a bit of a shock, even though I knew he was ill. I'd actually rolled a splif just as I got the phone call from my mother. In fact, I'd spoken to my mum (and heard my father in the background [sounding well] not long before). So smoking a biff was very ironic and stupid more to add, especially as I'd caned the green on a daily basis fo the last year and smoked ciggies 2 1/2 years prior [although long given up that].

As soon as I heard the news I came home the next day. It wasn't because of anything but supporting my mum and my brother who had gone through the most terrible ordeal. But if I had bigged up an important match I would have let my dad know about it and I know for a fact (even though not a Swindon fan) he would have said go and have fun (and get promoted). I know there was news last week that someone passed away in unfortunate circumstances. The fact is we could all go at any time and DO NOT feel guilty about doing things even though shit happens. You will mourn your loss and so will others. This does not affect what happens now. If you miss things now it will affect the rest of your life. You may not enjoy it, but you were there. And you can live and mourn things in your own time, guilt free because you did what you wanted to do, but you also recognised you father's life. I know I haven't put things in the best words but I hope you recognise the sentiment.

My sincere condolences to you and your family. I've actually shed a tear and I know it's no consilation but I hope this post puts things into perspective.

[Simon Pieman]

I think the point I'm making is that your actions change nothing. My dad regretted leaving 2 children of 21 and 19 years of age and also a wife of only 44 years. He knew that would happen, I and my family never held that against him.


Decisions like going to a football match are largely insignificant when you compare them to the life of a person.


Hope that makes you feel less guilty. Sorry again.

[millom red]

Feeling for you Herthab...my thoughts are with you and yours.
Ive lost plenty in my 37 years and with parents, it's hard. Once everyone is informed, and arrangements are in progress, I just try to go about my normal business within the first 48 hours....if there is football on, then i go to football. There is plenty of time for grieving in the days to come. The only thing i would suggest is to make sure that any family or relatives who are survived are being looked after before you make your decision....you never know who needs what or what needs doing until you ask the questions mate.

Deepest sympathies,

Millom Matt