Thetownend.com

This seems to be a song sung by many of our lot, with little or no self-awareness. That being said, once or twice they are right. Barrow was not great, although the weather and our football didn't help the mood and I have a recollection that the harbour side was nice and the Lakes are a beautiful area. I am watching Grimsby at the moment and have no real desire to go back there but the towns name doesn't help (rather like Scunthorpe) .

Stoke/Port Vale aren't great but the countryside surrounding it are good. After careful deliberation, I have decided where the song is most appropriate is Ashton Gate, not because that part of the world is not desirable, but because they are wankers for reasons I have made clear on this site on several occasions.

86/87 season was lively, last game of the season when we drew and stopped them getting in the play offs

Middlesbrough. Manchester United's Red Issue fanzine once did a 'shit away days' competition and Middlesbrough got an automatic bye to the semis. I can't remember now what won, but if it wasn't Smoggyville then it was a travesty of justice.

Birmingham City’s ground and local environs were a right throwback - that was the 4-6 game. Worst ever pub I’ve ever been in.

Raise you Luton.
Now that’s a real shit hole. Bradford early 80’s was on par but a lick of paint elevated it a little higher in the shit hole places.
Every Town and City has it’s rough part. Moss Side was always ok if you behaved yourself. Sat in the home end with some Citeh fans I used to know, lost 3-0 and no bother. It was before the game though in their “local” that was interesting, a large tattoo’d ugly Woman took a shine to me. First thought it was a wind up, until my Citeh Mate said, “We’re out of here.” One of the roughest families in Manchester 😂
They took some convincing that I didn’t try and pull her 😂

Think Luton must be up there for me.

Smoggy Land is rough.
Every one has 2 heads.

Luton, Peterborough, Southend, Bolton.

Makes me laugh/cringe when it gets sung somewhere like Cambridge or Brighton ...I look forward to it getting an airing at Harrogate :doh:

I'm surprised Gillingham's not been mentioned yet so allow me...I give you...Gillingham ;)

Middlesbrough for me. Fuck me that was rough when we won up there 3 2 and the surrounding area was rough.
Honourable mentions to Luton, Newport, Rotherham and Pikeyland. All total shitholes.

Vetch field Swansea was rough when I went

Aldershot

Luton, Middlesborough, Bolton, Oldham, Rochdale, Wigan, Leeds, Peterborough, Rotherham, Gillingham, Northampton, Tranmere, Newport, Bradford, Hartlepool, Crawley, Scunthorpe, Walsall and thats just towns with a league club that I can remember thats I have been to.

Oxford, Cambridge, Hull.

(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ9NelYCt62cZgvmu7QnugIyJtX2mzcrTRygQ&usqp=CAU)

Ashford,Kent

Don't you live there?

That's a list. Where do you live?

Half way between Yeovil and Exeter.

York City,  with the open corrugated wrap around toilet !!.

Worst bogs ever were Orient back in Macaris days. I pissed up against the back of the terrace and a copper asked what I was doing which was a bit of a dumb question as I had my cock out pissing. I told him to go look at the gents and then tell me I was wrong. You needed a fucking scuba diving outfit to get through the piss in the bogs.

Fair enough then. You're allowed.

Was that the game just before Christmas in 85? it was fucking cold, fucking wet, on an exposed terrace and we got fucking beat, horrible day out!

Don’t tell him pike

Your name vill also go on ze list!

Uncle Arthur…

Just for the record Grimsby play in Cleethorpes not Grimsby, albeit having done some work in Grimsby it isn't any better.

TBH OTTOMH cannot think of any north west place with a league club that isn't pretty grim, albeit (and admittedly not been there for 15 odd years and it may have improved considerably since then) possibly Swindon belongs on that list as well.



Sent from my SM-A125F

That's the badger.

Harrogate? Salford's in not too bad an area but there moving to a not quite so good one next season.

Springfield park was a dump inside and outside

I think you’re all being a bit precious. Footy comes from and goes with scalding pies and decent pints, standing terraces and rows of brick semis. Love getting me a bit of the old skool soul of the game. The real shitholes are those polished-turd betrayals of the spirit of the game - yes I’m looking at you Colchester, Forest Green, Oxford who I’d exchange for Torquay, Stockport and Notts County in a heartbeat.

Just outside,thankfully. But I long to come "home" to wilts

You would get lynched in those parts for suggesting that Harrogate is in the NW.

 

I've not yet had the pleasure of going to Oxford's new 😅 3-sided ground, but I went to the old Manor Ground (what is it with them and their delusions of grandeur?) many times, and it was most definitely up there as a shit hole.

Selhurst Park because of the journey and who it is home to.

The thread seems to be going in two directions - the club itself being referred to as a shithole, or the location of the club.

I think The New Den in South Bermondsey can cover both - horrible on all fronts, and I know that is just the way they like it.  An industrial wasteland in the centre of a City that even the gentrification of Peckham can't save.

Can't believe some of the town's mentioned.   Scunthorpe, Cleethorpes and Northampton are nowhere near the likes of Gillingham, Luton and Bradford in terms of shitness.

Crewe is the worst place to go for a night out and is a bit grim till you get to Queens park. 

Never been to Middlesbrough or Sunderland so look forward to those.

My mistake. I read North-West as North.

TBF pretty much my only experience of Swindon is driving to and from the CG and based purely on that I’d rank it alongside most of the worst ones mentioned on these thread.

I’m sure there there are lovely parts of the town but i certainly don’t get to see them

Iandolo had the armband when Payne went off against Northampton.
But presumably Conroy will be in and hence captain.

Sorry - somehow posted this on wrong thread - was replying to post on the squad list.
Not sure how that happened

Kidlington ?

Biggest village in Europe, apparently.

That's 3 different threads talking about Oxford's proposed new ground now.  :zzz:

somewhat disputed

Back to the subject, is this perhaps the worst chant in football?

You’re shit, aaaaaah?

Goodnight Irene

I was thinking when kids in a family stand sing "She fell over", but yeah, yours is worse.

"Inbred and roundabouts" sung by so many in an unironic way to us.

Also...

Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilllllllllllllllllllllll

Etc

It's probably up there.

At least "Goodnight Irene" and the annoying Millwall drone are unique to their football clubs, whether irritating or not.

You've gotta be kidding me.

Yep, no issue with original songs at all. My absolute worst is

“We’re by far the greatest team the world has ever seen……..”

Gets loud though.

What do you mean?

Makes me smile when you’re 1-4 down at home to a team like Man Citeh. Though greatest could mean more than just trophies in a glass cabinet.

It is one that everyone can and does join in with. Often sung after a goal so done with gusto! (not the online food subscription boxes)

Town End sung in one of last home games "There's fuck all wrong with you!" and it made me think years back it would have been either "She fell over" or remember this? "Bring on the dustbin"

Got me thinking some old school chants just disappeared. Probably around the time almost every chant annoyingly had to be sung to the tune of  Sloop john b to catch on.

There's a plethora of grounds in the "my garden shed..." category in L2 and a few in L1 as well.

A rousing chorus of "....., we're top of the league" is always good.
A scenario that doesn't happen that often so everyone should join in when it does.

The "no surrender" song is always cringeworthy, except to those who insist on partaking.

A bit of a museum piece, but an occasional rendition of "you're gonna get your fucking heads kicked in" might be enough to dissuade parents attending with kids who are not yet fully bladder trained.
Although to be fair to the guy next to me who regularly rolls up with up to 4 kids in tow, their bladder discipline is impeccable, so it can be done.

A favourite from the 70s

We don’t carry bottles
We don’t carry lead
We only carry hatchets
To bury in your head
We are loyal supporters
Fanatics every one
And we will follow (enter club)
Into Division One

What is the "no surrender" song?

...to the IRA.....

Keep St George in my heart keep me English
Keep St George in my heart I pray
Keep St George in my heart keep me English
Keep St George in my heart I pray
Keep me English till my dying day
No surrender, no surrender, no surrender to the IRA

etc etc

I thought it might have been that one but wondered if there was something different. Surely that hasn't been aired since the nineties has it?

Reminds me of a time I was in a rural part of the West of Ireland in 2016 and these old gits were drinking at the bar wearing IRA jackets. I went for a piss and one of them started to speak to me and heard my accent. "so your a tan are you?" I kind of shrugged my shoulder and told him I guess I must be. I later learned that he was a bit of a harmless chap and had the nickname "fingers" as he had blown 3 of them off with a gun. It is eye opening that these ridiculous characters still exist though.

The latest song I personally hate is the "XXXXXXX get battered everywhere they go". Just lame.

It hasn't been "aired" at town games in a fair few years that I have heard although it is at every England game and most 'Wall matches.

I am sure there was mention on the song in a match day thread this season, or maybe the last one with fans.

Yeah, albeit rare it still gets the occasional airing at town games.
Maybe once or twice a season, away from home.

Always thought that 'We're by far the greatest team the world has ever seen' could do with being taken apart clause by clause by a decent stand up. One for Ivo maybe?
e.g. - Not just 'one of the best', but 'the greatest'; so better than Man City then
Not content with that, we'll double up with 'by far'. So not just a bit better than Man City, but miles better.
Oh, hang on, why restrict it to the English Leagues; we'll go for the world. So better than Man City and Real and Bayern then...
As a final thought, lets not restrict ourselves to current teams, but the whole history of football. So better than Barca in 2000s, Hungary in the 60s, Ajax with Cruyff.
All seems totally fair enough to me.
**EDIT just realised the game kicked off at 7:30 and we're 1 down at Mansfield. FFS. Sure 70s Ajax would have shipped 3 at Field Mill by now.