Thetownend.com

When you need a shit but have no bog roll! :roll:

Use kitchen roll!

Would if I had any!  :roll:

Hmmm tough one, may have to use a towel and then chuck it out  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

ha ha use your hand

in africa they use their hand .. that why they always shake with the left

at least im sure thats what i was told .. tho it appears to be quite a generalisation

No. Think I may have to waddle over to the shop!

my mrs always uses all the bog roll then never replaces it so when i go in needing to drop meatloafs kids off at the pool i'm stuck and have to shout her to bring me some.

My gran has a bedae (sp)

Fantastic it is, water shoots up your crack  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

maybe you enjoy being shooted up your crack?

We used to have a beday (sp) when I lived in Cirencester! You don't seem to see many anymore unless staying in a hotel!

Maybe your obsessed with sex  :nod:

Is that a Beeday (sp) or a Birday?? :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

Birdy likes felching  :o

fuck off all of you I ain't saying anything ever again   :wink:

It'll never last....

thats the fort time this month shes said that!

It's Bidet.

 It may have taken a while, but it's good to see axs trying to raise standards.

I knew it was bidet but didn't want to appear middle class........

who has a bidet in their house? Bet no-one does.

We did have

That's why I used present tense in my question. I used to have a Bidet too but do you hear me shouting about it? No, I keep my water utilities in check thank you very much.

 One thing that life has taught me, is that you can't hide your class.

 

Used to have one. Great invention for the post-shit clean up. Why use shit roll, when you can wash all evidence of last nights curry from your arse and leave yourself fresh as a daisy?

I've never really liked using bogroll as an arse cleaning product to be honest. - If you got shit on your fingers, you'd never just wipe it off with toilet roll and carry on as if nothing had happened? So why leave an arse all fragrant and cakey?

We do, although it was here when we moved in. I'm well posh, me

Although i wouldn't use Barry's words, i agree with the sentiment! :)

No ... it's Wednesdet.

We don't have bidets in Russia, you just stamp your foot on the bathroom floor and a woman comes up with a killer spray. Things are looking up though as she's got a choice of nozzles now.

use the end of a loaf of bread, or your sock.

Never a truer word said.

It's water squirting bum guns all the way out here. i just couldn't be without one now.

Don't the Thai's have a stigma about using poo roll KokBang?

Yep.

They think that it is gross to not have a proper wash down there after a dump, come to think of it I find  using only TP a bit gross myself now.

what if its that nice wet sented stuff?

Nope, it still does nothing but smear shit all over your arse.

A good proper ring rinse is the only way.

I've never posted on here before, and reading all this I don't think I will ever again, can't you talk about something more pleasant on a Thursday afternoon?

 Its probably for the best, some of the birds on here are right dirty minxes, some of us fellas try and raise the tone with philosophical questions on the nature of class, but its hard work.

:D

Your the best Reg  ;D

yeah Reg!  :ironmyshiry:

ass rape ??

how to win friends by J R Elliot.

I thought that was quite mild compared to some of the stuff that goes on

fair point. you didn't even use the c word. y'know - cunt.

I was talking to a laydeeeeeeeeeeee


I do have some etiquette you know !

Do you take it up the Gary?

Yeah....come on love


Do you take it up the old Gary Glitter ?

marmite on toast?

Ouch!!

it's more bovril really, or oxo yeast extract drink.

You lot are totally mad, but it's fun to read!!

Hi

I notice from you're profile picture that you like dogs, maybe we could meet up i also like dogs

Take Care

xxxx

This is Toni, it has got to be..

Or Ben?

I hope its Toni

I'm a bit dubious of the "PCA69" in the signature.

It's not me or Toni as far as I know. You lot are well suspicious of new people.

I can guarantee its a genuine new poster.

Actually her account seems to have gone pear shaped, any mods know why?

maybe she's got a pearovirus

It said that she'd tried to change her email address, which means it needed reactivating. I've sorted it anyway. I think.

wooooooooooooo - POST POST POST POST POST POST POST POST POST POST POST POST !!!!

wooooooooooooooooooo PIC PIC PIC PIC PIC PIC

Watch out you lot, I'm on to you!

Im watching ........................

Cheers Ben

Please touch me

Bunch of dirty old men!

Suttonred my saviour!  :clap:

are you two married?

I'm right in the mood for a mega-wank, come on GLFT what are you some sort of fucking tease? Whap em out for crying out loud or I'll have to settle for an imagination shuffle.

Absolutely disgusting.

Makes me sick

Haha.

I thought you were working round the student population Dave

I am, are you glft?

Glft? Is that code for doggers

I am too

What? Into dogging

Ace.
Do you go down Coate water GLFT?

Give me a break, I'm new to this! :)

What dogging?

I'm amazed there's any female posters on here, with all the sexual innuendo and harrassment they receive when first posting.

Ignore them all GLFT, they find it difficult to interact with the fairer sex.

Think you're being rather generous about the interaction, my guess is most on here blink at sunlight and have hairy palms.

Thanks herthab, your support is most welcome, can you all go back to talking about bidet's now?

Nah I've shaved mine... makes me look more normal

yea but your sewn-on thumbs give you away as a villager...

I want to apologize for being so forward, may i buy you a drink in way of apology?

Fuck off tubby, I've already started work........

BIG BONED FFS

boing boing..

want another cream cake?

Don't you have a cat to rescue you skinny retard

day off mate