Thetownend.com

I only work part time but one of my 'colleagues' is the laziest, skiving fucker I've ever known.

I told him to his face he was a lazy cunt this morning - which went down well - but all it's done is to make the shagger even worse.

I'm not one for squealing but he's doing my head in.

Any ideas?

What does he do? Or not as the case may be.

How about working even harder to make up for his shortfall?

That way the company doesn't lose out and everyone is happy.

Do paperboys ride tandems these days?  :)

Why not squeal? It's not like you haven't tried to tell him yourself. Perhaps someone higher up will make him get his arse in gear.

Unless you work for the Mafia or something. I didn't know they had part time opportunities available though

Work in a warehouse. He disappears better than Houdini. Wanders around, sits on the shitter texting - even caught him napping in the back of an empty trailer!

At least you havent caught him having a wank.... yet.

Mate of mine used to work in a warehouse, he reckoned he could fit 3-4 in during a 10 hour shift.

Sure it wasn't a whorehouse?

Nope definitely a warehouse,

Are you his line manager?

If not, it's not your issue unless it affects your work.

I worked in a supermarket warehouse after I left school, used to spend my time when things were quiet trying to pull the female checkout operators...or taking the piss out of the boss, Gareth Keenan style.

I've worked in Iceland warehouse, and there was one bloke who used to stick chocolate, mostly flakes, into his socks....

There has always been a strand within the British worker, for doing little things which make the job a bit more bearable.

Of course as the post war world has " progressed " and we're seen to be in the gobal race, the ruling classes and their political wing, have sought ways to return working conditions to the 19th Century, when we were world leaders in such things as child labour, work place fatality and slum housing conditions endemic with disease.

Which is why Tory ministers like Jeremy Hunt, can with a straight face extol the virtues of wage reduction, cuts in working tax credit, and dispensing with EU working time directives, by Brexit, as a means of making people work harder and longer to be more like the Chinese.

 :pint:

Reg is now blaming the Tories for the fact that people no longer put chocolate in their shoes

You must have heard the phrase 'Margaret Thatcher, stolen flake snatcher'...  :D

Ding dong the Twix is dead

 :D

A ripple of applause.

Anyway, back on topic...

Typical media distortion, I'm holding them accountable for insertion of chocolate into socks. Shoes are a different matter altogether.

Do your job really well and then bring it to the managements attention the difference between yours and his productivity. Make a suggestion that they bin him and make you full time (if that's what you want of course).

Management won't see it as squealing, especially if it saves them money and ups productivity.  With regards to what he thinks, fuck him.

Bring it to your managers attention.
He will arrange a chat with said employee - he'll bring his Union Rep.
The Union Rep will counter claim that the manager is bullying and harassing said employee by picking on him and monitoring his productivity.
....and nothing changes!

I'm not going to squeal on him. I thought I could shame him into pulling his finger out, but he genuinely doesn't give a shit that I have him sussed.

Apart from annoying the shit out of me it really has little impact on me.

I though this was going to be about Bushy Boy....

Shrink wrap him to a pallet and shut the trailer doors.

Management must be monumentally shit if they haven't noticed anything.

Just make his life difficult. Is that not the standard thing for lazy arseholes at work?

There speaks the weary voice of an ex-manager... :D

Current, when they need it! Ex when they don't.

Best/Worst of both worlds.

So why worry then, it's not like your work is very important is it.....

Whose is?

Done my bit over the years, just a gentle slide into my second retirement!

Well I meant a warehouse bloke having a skive isn't like an ambulance driver, nurse, air traffic controller having a kip on duty, didn't mean it to sound how it came out!

It's only a pisser on a personal level.

It grips my shit. I could stay at home and do fuck all if I wished, but if I go to work I expect to work.

Don't understand those that choose not to.

Why do most ambulance drivers look like dykes and whats the craic with the shades?