Thetownend.com

Im sure we have all got them. At the moment my collegue is trying to work out if its possible to walk from Portugal to Thailand :?

Anyone else got a few weirdos in the office

Yeah - we've got a religious nut who bangs on about Jesus all day every day, it drives me round the bend.

Is there a reason why you can't just wander through europe and have a little jolly through asia? Or is he doing it properly making sure you can get visa's and stuff in countries you'd want to pass through?

You can trek from London - Sydney covering 20 countries on the way for less than 4 grand with ozbus!

In my last job we had this MASSIVE woman , one day she was crying to me over the desk and said my boyfriend has left me for drugs ,would you leave me for drugs? ,Instantly I replied I left skinnier girls than you for drugs before :shock:

Fuck me i regretted saying that

 :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

why bother, fly for £500  :D

he is looking at routes where he does not have to cross water??? Fucking nuts he is

 :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

You have to go through one of Iran or Russia if you're doing a full on land only trek. I'm sure I remember reading Russia being funny about giving tourist visa's for people who didn't have a  fixed length of stay or an address. I'm sure if that's the case you could bribe an official. Probably a better bet that heading through Iran and then various other istans.

Of course it's possible, they are both part of the same land-mass.

But why? is he actually planning on doing it?

ye i do, but he posts on here so done wanna say too much about him.

eh berni?

 :D

None whatsoever

We have a whole dept known as the window lickers.

http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b100/landofbo/windowlicker.jpg

Weird doesn't do them justice.

Its all about the countries in between!  :D

I have worked with a few people if you throw so much as a sweet wrapper into THEIR bin.

Freaks, what fucking difference does it make?

I think you've missed some words.

The whole of our IT department. In fact people that work in IT in general.  :P

My colleague swapped my new bin for his old one cheeky sod so I waited for him to go then swapped it back!

I once worked with a women who was an ex traffic warden, she would feel my engine to see what tiem I got to work, any visitors cars she woudl call up DVLA and find out who owned them!

Crazy days, eh, the laughs must never end at your place  :D

Trust me, where I work is severely lacking humour!  :D
If I tried some of the pranks we pulled at my old place here I'd prob get sacked!

On purpose of course, I find adds to challenge my posts reading.

I quite like it.


I have worked with a few people who start eating their own shit if you throw so much as a sweet wrapper into THEIR bin.

I think I am the weirdo in my office  :cry:

everyone is being mean to me today as I said I want to be like Blanche from Corrie when Im an old lady

I work with some right weirdo's. This one girl I remeber put her lunch tin the microwave, sat down talked for the whole HOUR about how she hated her old job and how she was going to take them to court and didn't even touch her lunch!

Someone not touching thier lunch is the wierdest of all wierd office behaviour.  I have trouble not stealing other peoples once I've finished mine :wink:

2 dippy lads I used to work with at the sports centre once decided to put a peguin bar in the staff room microwave and nuke it - they walked out of the staff room and left the microwave on only to come back ten minutes later to find smoke billowing out of the staff room door - the fire alarms went off and the whole centre had to be evacuted including everyone In the swimming pool etc!
The duty manager was in such a panic he then forgot that if the fire alarm goes off the whole pool system shuts down so the pool was left all night with no heating/water/chlorine going into it.

So the centre had to shut for a day and a half - all over a penguin bar!

We've got some right weirdos.

There's the 27 stone woman who eats about 10 meals a day, who's just finished work early today because she's flying out to Morrocco tomorrow to marry a heavyweight champion boxer she met over the internet when he randomly emailed her. True story.

I hope she watched "tonight" on ITV last night.   All about Nigerian blaggards defrauding desperate british women with fake internet romances :mrgreen:

How does one go about finding these desperate women with which to start these internet romances? Sounds like fun. I wouldn't defraud them as much as those Nigerians either.

pm me or mex we have lots of addresses

I think you might of watched the TV programme I watched last night!?

Nope. Don't think I watched any telly last night. Was there some super fit desperate tinterweb ladies saying that they want unemployed skint geeky sexy men like me?

I think it was tonight with Big Trev

Im sorry but it was mostly obese northerners who couldnt string a sentence together who thought they were being wooed by wealthy American models

mmm... obese northerners.

From what I saw all you need to do is write them a bit of crappy poetry and send them a bunch of flowers with a soppy note then pretnend you have been robbed and have no money and they give you there life savings... EASY!

Hahaha, the henna bird!

I used to chat to her when i popped out for a fag. I must've been told about her boyfriend a million times. She showed me a photo once and i just found myself asking, what's in it for him?

Oh well, we all have our crosses to bear and perhaps his is women partial to the odd snack.

Alot of the Thai bar girls do something similar out here, sending messages back to their "Boyfriend" back in Europe, UK, US or wherever.

They send Emails along the lines of "I love you soo much baby, I don't want to work in bar again but I have no money for my rent and for food, if you send me money then I don't have to work in bar again and I dont have to sleep with another man again, please send me money because I want to be only yours"

So the BF sends the money to stop her from working in a go-go bar, she then  collects the money along with the money that the other 20 or so BF's sent her, after receiving the same copied and pasted email. And then heads off to work, in a go-go bar to find more "Boyfriends"

Some of them are MINTED.

There was this bloke, about 55ish, who used to come in to the Esso i worked in when i was about 16. He used to bring his 'girlfriend' in with him who couldn't have been a day over 25. She spoke very broken English and he would always hold her hand and kiss her loads, for no reason other than to show she was his.

It used to make me feel sorry for him that he was proud and liked to show her off, while clearly she was less than and perhaps even looked uncomfortable. We all have our crosses...

I tell you, this place is riddled with fucking retards.

That Jason fella who used to work in the contact centre, he was a bit of a spazzer...

I tell you, this place is riddled with fucking retards.

That Jason fella who used to work in the contact centre, he was a bit of a spazzer...

 :wink:

:D

Mate, I swear the cc is 90% made up of people who got moved down from remedial class. I used to do a spot of coaching to the new starters and some people seem to be completely unable to absorb anything. You have to repeat almost everything over and over to no avail.

Just basic DP would take months some times. I had one 'tard who I used to log breaches for about 10 times in any given day. And being the lazy cunt that i am, i barely logged a fraction of what i should've because it was pointless. In the end he was pulled off the phones and given a one on one day of DP training. Little changed post training and he left shortly after.

Did you ever have the pleasure of meeting Barry Morris?

 :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick: I coached him for complaints, a real joy. He reminded me of the bloke who made his daughter a theatre type from Extras. Barry "Honest i'm not gay, look i've got kids and stuff" Morris.

oh my god where do you guys work?

Why, do you want a job? I think you'd fit right in.  :D

I used to work with this guy, Spenser, who was a bit of a window licker. He said he was 'severly dyslexic' and therefore could not cash drop his till (i.e. take out £100 when the till has over £200 in it) or count it at the end of the shift. I basically had to do his jobs as well as mine on a closing shift which was very stressful on a busy friday night. Eventually the manager got the point, after all the complaints received about him from customers and staff.

He now works at the Odeon with two of my former housemates, who I never really got on with. I like to think they all sit around and reminisce about me fondly :D

I had some guy working for me once, he really was not the full ticket.

He was utter shite at his job, constantly late and his general attitude sucked.

The bloke was so fucking thick that he would need to call me 2/3 times a week to ask where the office is. And conversations went along the lines of.

Me: Where are you?, you're late again.
Him: I can't find the office.
Me: Well jump on a motorbike taxi then. Where abouts are you?
Him: I don't know where I am, where is the nearest motorbike taxi stand to me?

Dumb cunt, he didn't last long.

my PA is a bit thick but she takes it up the arse

 :D

I think i'm probably the weird colleague 8)

Charming.  Glad I put bogies in your sandwich for today  :P

i work in the same building as scot munro  :(

I hate one of my colleagues with a passion, he has no IT experience or qualifications but got the senoir position over me because he was an internal candidate.  He thinks I am here to be his bitch and wait on him.  He is a whiny cunt and I want to punch him the the fucking face with a hand made of razor blades

To eb honest I probbaly am the office nutter!

Dear god...Colin Hunt...?

Do you walk round with a trolley and a ginger wig on?

Um no, but a office full of cockneys is enough  to drive anyone fuckin mad.

We've got a Welsh woman who works in the restaurant and she's not the brightest... She starts conversations off with people at the front of the queue then carries it on with everyone behind them. They aren't even good conversations, last time she served me she was showing me a picture of a cactus plant she was looking after. I went back later that day and she was showing everyone else the same picture.

Entertaining though, if extremely irritating.

We've got some Northern Cunt from Grimsby at work who's stalker-tastic when it comes to Bruce Springsteen, he's going to 24 of the 27 world tour dates and he has also admitted that he spends up to 12 hours a time outside Bruce Springsteen's Hotel.  :shock:

That IS weird