Thetownend.com

My dad died this morning. He was 65 and one of the fittest blokes I know, didn't smoke, excercised, watched what he ate, etc,etc.

He had a massive heart attack and was gone.

I know I'll miss him and I'm sorry he's gone, he was a good mate as well as my dad.

However, I'm still going tomorrow and I'm feeling a bit guilty.

What do you guys think?

sorry to hear that, thoughts are with you

Sorry to hear that mate.By the sound of it your dad would want you to get out and enjoy the football.You would be sat at home just thinking over things herthab and that would make it worse imo

i'm sorry to hear that. My thoughts are, go to football, i'm sure he would've wanted you to go

Sorry to hear it.
Go, it's what he would have wanted.

Really sorry to hear that. I lost my Dad five years ago. Deepest sympathies.

Fucking hell man, sorry to hear that, I really am.  I lost my old man 20 years ago but it still feels like last week. It's a strange feeling. You don't know what you are supposed to do exactly.

All you can do is do your own thing.

There is no right way and no wrong way.

I personally think you should go to the game and I don't think there is any reason for you to feel to feel bad about it.

I feel your pain man. I really do.

when my dad died two years ago i went out and got pissed with my brothers, he wouldn't have wanted us moping around because of him, and although every situation is different, i'm sure your dad would want you to do whatever makes you feel good.

Thoughts are with you herthab!

Go to the game. I don't see that it would have upset him and maybe it will be good for you to do something normal like go to footy

That's sad to hear Steve  :cry:

Personally I wouldn't go to football after something like that, especially with a game as important as tomorrow.

There would be too many emotions running wild.

But you should do whatever you think is best. If you want to go to football then go. I'm sure your Dad would've wanted you to do whatever felt best.

My condolences mate. I don't think that I would personally be able to face it if I was in your circumstances but if your Dad would have wanted you to go, then go.

Thats awful news mate, sorry to hear it. Just do what ever your dad would of wanted you to do

Sorry mate.

There is no right or wrong. Do what you feel in your heart.

Deepest sympathies.

So very sorry to hear about that Steve, may he rest in peace but please dont feel guilty, my mum passed away a few months back and I do know exactly how you feel.

However there is absolutely nothing you can do and your life must contiue, save your grief for your private times and for the funeral but stay strong, its so bloody hard to at this time I know and please dont feel in any way guilty about tomorrow.

If you need anything you have my email addy Steve.

take care.

My condolences to you and the family.

You know what you want to do, and what your dad would've wanted - don't feel guilty or let others make you feel bad.

Just don't go on your own, as Sam said, too many emotions tomorrow.

Condolences go out to you and your family herthab.  :(

I'm sorry to hear that Herthab. Condolences to you and yours.

On the still wanting to go tomorrow thing, I think it is just human nature to want a release from thinking about everything. It's like you need time out to take it all in. Go if you want to and don't feel bad about it - it doesn't mean you don't care. You will grieve in your own way and in your own time.

That's what I think anyway.

My condolences to you are your family. Go out and enjoy tomorrow, im sure he would have wanted it.

Sorry to hear that, losing someone is never nice  :(

Do what you think is best.....

It may sound cliche but I expect he would want you to go out and enjoy yourself and celebrate promotion....

Right I'm not sure how to put this because it's really fucking dumb and I'm half cut.


When my Dad died in the summer of lung cancer it was rather sudden and a bit of a shock, even though I knew he was ill. I'd actually rolled a splif just as I got the phone call from my mother. In fact, I'd spoken to my mum (and heard my father in the background [sounding well] not long before). So smoking a biff was very ironic and stupid more to add, especially as I'd caned the green on a daily basis fo the last year and smoked ciggies 2 1/2 years prior [although long given up that].

As soon as I heard the news I came home the next day. It wasn't because of anything but supporting my mum and my brother who had gone through the most terrible ordeal. But if I had bigged up an important match I would have let my dad know about it and I know for a fact (even though not a Swindon fan) he would have said go and have fun (and get promoted). I know there was news last week that someone passed away in unfortunate circumstances. The fact is we could all go at any time and DO NOT feel guilty about doing things even though shit happens. You will mourn your loss and so will others. This does not affect what happens now. If you miss things now it will affect the rest of your life. You may not enjoy it, but you were there. And you can live and mourn things in your own time, guilt free because you did what you wanted to do, but you also recognised you father's life. I know I haven't put things in the best words but I hope you recognise the sentiment.

My sincere condolences to you and your family. I've actually shed a tear and I know it's no consilation but I hope this post puts things into perspective.

I think the point I'm making is that your actions change nothing. My dad regretted leaving 2 children of 21 and 19 years of age and also a wife of only 44 years. He knew that would happen, I and my family never held that against him.


Decisions like going to a football match are largely insignificant when you compare them to the life of a person.


Hope that makes you feel less guilty. Sorry again.

Feeling for you Herthab...my thoughts are with you and yours.
Ive lost plenty in my 37 years and with parents, it's hard. Once everyone is informed, and arrangements are in progress, I just try to go about my normal business within the first 48 hours....if there is football on, then i go to football. There is plenty of time for grieving in the days to come. The only thing i would suggest is to make sure that any family or relatives who are survived are being looked after before you make your decision....you never know who needs what or what needs doing until you ask the questions mate.

Deepest sympathies,

Millom Matt