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Author Topic: Friday Joke Thread  (Read 217869 times)
dave_bambers_right_sock

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« Reply #720 on: Friday, June 24, 2016, 09:47:20 »

Tell you what people, this is the worst anyone's seen Sterling since the Russia game
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Munichred

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« Reply #721 on: Friday, June 24, 2016, 15:33:34 »

The footsie's going down, the pounds going down, Asian markets going down. Everything! I must tell the girlfriend...
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pauld
Aaron Aardvark

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Absolute Calamity!




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« Reply #722 on: Monday, June 27, 2016, 23:09:10 »

(shamelessly stolen off a mate on facebook):

I've just ordered Bonnie Tyler's Goalkeeping Blunders Vol 2.
It's just totally clips of Joe Hart
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Peter Venkman
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Back Off Man, I’m A Scientist.



« Reply #723 on: Tuesday, June 28, 2016, 07:42:07 »

I'm selling off all my old medieval punishment equipment all of it almost 50% off, Get them while Stocks last.
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adje

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« Reply #724 on: Wednesday, June 29, 2016, 07:38:25 »

I have a chicken-proof lawn.its impeccable
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quot;Molten memories splashing down
 upon the rooves of Swindon Town"
Peter Venkman
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« Reply #725 on: Wednesday, June 29, 2016, 08:54:45 »

Me and my mates are in a band called Duvet.
We're a cover band.
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Bewster

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We fucking love you Gumbo!




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« Reply #726 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 11:13:18 »

Who is the best person at a hospital ??


The Ultra Sound guy  Grin

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Flashheart

« Reply #727 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 11:16:12 »

 Grin
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Peter Venkman
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« Reply #728 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 11:26:19 »

How about an old 70s joke....

Bloke walks into a pub and asks for a pint of anything except Stella.

The barman asks "What's wrong with Stella?"

"I had 12 pints of Stella last night and when I came round I was fucking skint!" said the bloke

The barman says "12 pints of anything in here costs about the same price so why is Stella the problem?"

"Because Skint is my dog...."
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Johnny Reeves

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« Reply #729 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 11:27:47 »

Luke Williams up for manager off the month.
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Sir Cliff Pipehard

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« Reply #730 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 14:56:03 »

I had a dream last night where I was shagging the blond one out of Abba




His beard didn't half scratch my bollocks ...
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adje

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« Reply #731 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 16:30:02 »

I discovered my first grey pubic hair today.I wasn't freaked out by it tho',unlike the other people in the lift
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quot;Molten memories splashing down
 upon the rooves of Swindon Town"
Mother Brown

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« Reply #732 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 19:32:40 »

What do you call a **** in a skip?
Rumma Jing.




I"ll get me coat.

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Legends-Lounge

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Non PC straight talking tory Brexit voter on this




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« Reply #733 on: Friday, September 23, 2016, 20:52:52 »

I was in the pub tonight minding my own business when a bloke hit me with a power tool. Bosch, just like that for no reason.
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Peter Venkman
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« Reply #734 on: Monday, September 26, 2016, 08:27:02 »

I was at the Zoo over the weekend.

In one of the enclosures there was a slice of toast.

It was bread in captivity.
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