Thetownend.com

Continuing the theme.

What's the best one-off chant you've heard at a Town game? Something sung once and then never again. A couple stick in the mind from recent years. Remember Eric Sabin being scouted by QPR (or had signed a pre-contract?) and he fluffed a chance over the stand leading to the Town End to chant "Are you watching QPR?" Another was when Parkin scored his debut hatrick. Barnsley had just taken the lead from a Chris Lumsdon pen who then preceded do a stupid dance in front of the Town End. Later in the game with Town winning, a chant of "you're not dancing anymore" was directed at him  :D

not really a chant but
PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPHHHHHHHHIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

"He's got a pineapple, on his head" - think it was Onadi Lowe when he was with Rushden?

Didn't he get his nudger out that game?

Cant remember which game in the PL season it was, but I remember the home fans singing

'Going down, going down, going down'

with the Town fans replying:

'So are we, so are we, so are we'

Gallows humour at its best!

Super, super mark, super, super mark, super, super mark, super market trolley. I wasn't there but heard of it being directed at Mark McCammon and it made me chuckle.

When the Shrivy Road did "eeee eeee eeeee eeeee" with the pretend knife stabbing action to Trevor Morely after he had recovered from being stabed by his wife.

"We can see you washing up" at Orient.

Or "ordering a takeaway" to the fat ginger kid at Leeds who having taken a barrage of abuse for 20 minutes or so, pulled his phone out to presumably call his mummy.

Us: Swindon
Pox: Shit

Us: Swindon
Pox: Shit

Us: Swindon
Pox: Shit

Us: Swindon
Pox: Shit

Us: Oxford
Pox Shit

Us: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The 'He ran on your pitch' in the game against Northampton, or that chant we sang to akinfenwa about eating all the pies same game

Not so much a chant as terrace banter that sticks in my mind.  Must have been shortly after I started going because I was standing on a busy Stratton Bank and the incident concerned Duncan Shearer, who had just scuffed a shot.  Seconds later, someone at the back yells 'Shearer, you fucking donkey!' and, because the stand had fallen quite quiet, the abuse carried across the whole of the Bank...and probably quite a lot further than he had intended.

You could have heard a pin drop.  Moments later another bloke at the front of the stand turns around, leans up against one of the railings so everyone could see him and shouts, in a broad Wiltshire accent 'Oi, who said that?'  Everyone turns around to see bloke #1, now apologetically holding his hand in the air, obviously regretting his outburst.  Aware he's got the attention of just about everyone, bloke at the front then jabs his finger at bloke #1 and shouts back, very slowly and deliberately 'He's fucking God!'  Only time I can remember where a terrace wag has brought the house down.

I remember against Luton once when the town end started singing 500 singhs & not 1 song.

town fans used to sing that a lot to paul edwards as well. Was looking a decent prospect at the time but turned down a contract with us and never played higher

Chelsea on Glenda's return.

I'd not heard the Elland Road "is there a fire drill?" song before that game. But I've noticed it elsewhere so I guess we nicked it. There was also the "We're going to West Ham, you're going to Daggenham" chant.

Wasn't all that post Jaason Lee though, not sure it counts.

Unlike...Teeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaa tooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwel

TEEEEEAAAAA TOWEL ad infinitum at one of the Sodjes when Yeovil visited.  He got so wound up he ended up getting sent off.  Good work Town End!   :D

Outside the Dun Cow pub in Shrewsbury in arounf '96 which had been taken over by us when a long haired odd looking bloke walked past got a barrage of "Peter Sutcliffe in Disguise"

The one which made me laugh when on the recieving end of it was from Rovers fans this season with "Inbreds and roundabouts"...oh the irony of people from Bristol calling US inbreds!! ;D

"You're only here, to see the Town" (reverse chant to Lids when we went 3-0 up)
"Taaaayyyyyyyyyyyylllooooooooorrrrrrrrrrr"
"Sing when you tarmac" :)

"You should have gone christmas shopping" when we beat Walsall at their place one december.

Darren Ferguson, your old man's a cunt. It caught on and the whole away end joined in. Brilliant.

Although not a one-off it's only caught on once so I'm going to count it: The Simon Ferry one to the Duck Sauce/Barbra Streisand is both brilliant and good fun.

Your old man's a cunts, your old man's a cunts. Oh Darren Ferguson, your old man's a cunts.

Winner.

Away at Layer Road, Colchester maybe 6 or 7 years ago...

My garden shed,
My garden shed,
Is bigger than this!
Is bigger than this!
My garden shed is bigger than this!
It's got a door and a window,
My garden shed is bigger than this!

Colchester were so stung by this criticism that they immediately commissioned their new ground.

Taaaaayyyyyllllllooooooorrrrr

In the interests of pedantry, would you like some clarification on 'one-off'...?

This, his reaction was comedy gold.

I clearly don't go to as many games as you do.

i think it was to Paul trollope "You're a cunt, your dads a ledge", "you're a cunt, your dads a ledge"
(correct me if im wrong)

 Fat Bobby Davro, you're just a fat Bobby Davro.....

Taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyylllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wins for me, best crowd reaction, best player reaction I have ever seen.  Poor kid. Turned out a tidy player though.

"Constable, Constable you stayed at oxford and won fuck all"


I've only heard it once so far...

first game against oxford once joey had gone back (i think/assume) he got so much stick all game (does youre mummy know you're here etc.) then we started singing 'cry in a minute, he's gonna cry in a minute...' poor boy looked so upset

Not a chant as such but at Stockport away during the Malpas reign I took about 10-12 mates, many who had never been to a football match, on my stag night. I cannot remember why but it was dead quiet and some bloke shouted in the broadest Wiltshire accent I have ever heard 'Aljofree you're a fucking disgrace' at which point Aljofree then turned round and offered him out at half time.

Just was extremely surreal...

Then mark walters karate kicked him in the head 8)

Bradford away 0-0 on a freezing cold mid week night in the late 90s just after linesmen had been renamed 'Referee's Assistants':

Lino flags for what seemed like the 100th dodgy offside of the night, to quiet groans from the stands. One card shouts out 'No wonder you're only the fuckin assistant!', which echoes around the ground and is greeted by chuckling from both sets of fans and a blush from the Lino!

As you've posted in the thread you've just prompted another memory.

Paul Ince's debut for us away at Wrexham, up stands KT and yells "Go on son, make a name for yourself". Made I larf.

Aljokefree, hehe

Anyone remember a mid-week game in the late 80s, there was an opposition player who did nothing wrong other than his first name was Julian. All I remember is the Shrivvy Road stand giving him a lot of shrill calls of "Julian! Julian!"

Also, not an original one maybe, but only time I got to sing "Stand up for the champions!" will go down in memory as a classic.

Had a lot of juvenile fun with the Alan O'Brien chant of "Alan! Alan!"

Jack Smith and JP doing their best not to piss themselves added to it as well.

hehe, it was actually 'you could have made a name for yourself there' as he put a shot off target.  i have to admit i was rather proud of that one

I'll claim that one. His name was Julian Broddle and he played for some Northern club. He was not a happy bunny.

Dick Van Dykes a Swindon fan, Swindon fan, Swindon fan
Dick Van Dykes a Swindon fan, he solves murders

Years back we played Forest a little while after Peter Shilton had been struck by a dart.

The Town End......hes got a dart board for a face hes, got a dart board for a face.

I was devastated when he shaved his 'tache off - ruined!

I started fire drill at Leeds, nicked it off Exeter fans. Best ever was shrubby road against notts county. Awful linesman and someone to the tune of witicha lineman sang dead loud. "he's a linesmen for the county"

'Christian Roberts, he's gone for a pint.. He's gone for a pint, He's gone for a piiint...'  :pint: At the charity match this season.

Chav / Stone Island Warrior in empty stand next to away end when we played Colchester away in last play off season taunted the Town fans after Colchester score and leads to a classic exchange and quality one off chant to finish as follows.

"Back to school on Monday" Town fans.

Extreme reaction from Chav and stewards arrive.

"Tell him off,Tell him off"
"Throw him out, Throw him out" Town fans

Excitable pointing by Chav to 1500 Town fans. At this point his Mum (?) in the disabled section behind intervenes and he is allowed to stay on the condition he sits with her.

"Sit with your Mummy, You've got to sit with your Mummy" Town fans
Mum calms him down
"You are embarassing, You are embarassing" Town fans
Mum and Stewards calm him down

PAUSE

"YOU'RE MUMS GOT SAGGY TITS, YOU'RE MUMS GOT SAGGY TITS"

Chav goes ape, runs towards away end and is thrown out.

Priceless!

 :clap: :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

In 1990/91 at Portsmouth away to the tune of Always Look on the Bright Side of Life (and Man U had been adopted that one) which was the season after the Football League demotion.

Always look on the bright side of life, Do Doo,
When you're feeling down, think of Swindon,
We're the team that was promoted to the 3rd,
Which is pretty shit we reckon, cos we started in the 2nd,
That's why we think the Football League is absurd.

It then broke into a round of 'The Football League is full of shit'

I remember this, really funny moment even though we played shit. I wonder if he ever returned to a match after this ! Another good one was at Rovers " Back to the orphanage " the Funniest from away fans would be " you dirty northern bastards " sang by Torquay at our place.

I think we all were. 

RIP DVD's tache

"You should have gone to the circus" at Crawley last season.

The most I have ever laughed at a game was in the Town End about 6 years ago when some nutter they let out for the weekend kepts singing Jesus Christs Barmy Army and Gods Red and White Army. I think he kept shouting the score really loud too. Threeeeee - Onnnneeeee. It was just really random and I think you had to be there to appreciate it. Anyone that was will agree it was very funny.

I also liked it the season we had Julian playing in goal against us. and cries of Juuulian. And Braaaaaaaaaain!

I also enjoyed it when the Reeves brothers played against each other and David Reeves was sent off. So I started 'where's your brother gone?' and Alan promptly pointed to the tunnel.

Can't be arsed to trawl thru all the posts, but has anyone mentioned the FA Cup game at Oxford where a couple of yellow inbreds met in the centre circle at half time to pledge their troth to the dulcent tones of:

'Does she take it up the arse'

from the massed Reds

remember singing to Wolves fans 'we want to be together' (nicked from that old tv advert can't remember which) to which they replied 'we're not from birmingham'....

my favourite though is to the Brighton fans....'we can see you sucking cock'

I (and the mates sat/stood with me) would like to take credit for starting that one! It still comes up in conversation whenever anyone tells me about where they got engaged!!

And it was live on the bbc as well.

Early kick-off. Was in the Worthy at 8.00 before setting off!

"Wed to your sister, you're getting wed to your sister" might have worked too.

Away to the Gas in the 08/09 season, their PA started up their traditional pre match 'Goodnight Irene' (don't think any of them were actually singing) to which we, quite rightly, retorted with

'Irene takes it up the arse' and
'Irene's a prostitute'

Cut to 30 minutes into the match

One of their young wannabe Danny Dyers is down the front of the stand giving it 'the big un' to the away end. Now this charmer was, by anyones estimation, in no way pie shy.

The fat lad slunk back to his seat to a Swindon sound track of

'Even Irene Turned You Down'

I think we lost, but that stuck a lot longer in the memory than the game itself.

All good fun.

was that the same match where a fat bastards to the left of the tent got some abuse for carrying an assortment of savory snacks, which annoyed him, then it got louder & louder until his gargoyle like girlfriend joined in the angry fist waving at us to the tune of "two Vicky Pollards" ?
They were led away by the police.

that was also funny

Yes, I think that was the same bloke

Burton away this season, ross atkins in goal for burton and one man shouting "atkinssssss, your just a shit low carb diet"

this thread has had in stitches for ages at work this afternoon!  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

A few classic memories for me especially the Julian chanting!!

My favourite was at this years JPT game against Barnet at Home
1 guy tried starting a We are Paolos Red and White army chant, which didnt cotton on and no one joined in, he tried and tried again, a good 5 or 6 times, but still no one joined in.
Eventually he stood up and screamed "I AM PAOLO'S RED AND WHITE ARMY!" to which most of the people around him pointed at him and sang "He is Paolos red and white army!" and this went back and forth etc.
Was funny at the time I guess