Thetownend.com

There has been a lot of comment about this at work today.

If I buy a chilled or ambient sausage roll from a supermarket there will be no VAT.

If I buy a hot sausage roll from Greggs I will pay VAT.

Greggs don't keep there stuff on hotplates, so stuff that isn't purchased within a few minutes goes cold. Will they have 2 prices for their sausage rolls to reflect whether or not they are hot? If I buy a cold one will I be able to ask for the VAT back?

More importantly, will they be able to sell you a cold sausage roll (VAT free) and then offer to warm it up for free after the transaction has been completed?

The phrasing of this law is crazy and how on earth it got through any sort of checking is a wonder...

It probably was checked but by upper class fuckwits who have no fucking idea. If this was put to someone on the real world it would have been laughed at - its a shame no MP lives in the real world

How do you make a sausage roll?

Place it at the away end of Barnets pitch.

The solution is to increase ambient temperature to about 60 or 70 degrees.

Had to laugh today when some government sympathising cunt was being interviewed on 5 Live along with Greggs MD.

They all debated the rights and wrongs of the VAT increase on Pasties etc, and when she lost the argument she asked the Greggs bloke 'well if the government dont implement VAT on Pasties, where else are can they raise the £20m (might of been billions - cant remember) that the proposed VAT increase will bring in?

For some reason, 5L didn't read out my text which suggested that the government should shove VAT where the dont shine, let alone start applying it to Pasties and sausage rolls.

Greggs should continue flogging their rank heat-attack inducing pastry products without VAT just to defy the wankers from Whitehall. What are they going to do, send the bailiffs in to all 600+ branches to collect the money?

 

If it's heat attack inducing then surely it would make sense to sell it cold as it will warm up on its own?

All that saturated fat, connective gristle, testicular tissue, anal gland muscle and penile/vaginal flaperian membrane will solidify at colder temperatures - which will play fucking havoc with your arteries.

If you insist on buying one cold, just leave it in the cupboard for a few days, monitor the temperature, and consume just before the temperature at which spontaneous combustion occurs.

Whoosh

Whoosh yerself, Fola - you thick cunt.

Double whoosh. You don't get it.

Same way as you make an apple turnover.

Whats going to happen to the clubs food, they say its hot but it bloody well aint

I think it's hilarious. Toffs yet again showing just how distanced they really are from society.

The same is also applicable for making a Swiss roll, a venetian blind and a Maltese cross I assume?

Good gravy

Is that taxable too?

Have they taxed my hot takeaway Panini's with Parma Ham and Manchego cheese?

That maybe so but Labour would've had to have done exactly the same thing...

It's a dubious claim that it's food as well. Maybe that's a getout.

In which case, I'd be laughing at that bunch of toffs as well

Toffs? Milliband and Balls popped into a Greggs just the other day and didn't look at allout of place :)

Osborne          I'm on tv in a minute so what is a pasty, then?

Adviser            Its like boeuf en croute minister, except with extra potato