Thetownend.com

where is the old bum? this is the longest i have not seen him post! :)

He's got a bird and left Swindon.

No he's still in Swindon...but she told him it was either her or the TEF.

and now he's taking her to a back street boys concert?

he has changed!!

His clothes?

he's dead.

shit, i knew i should of had him for the tef death predictions

Has he found his front door?

If only Ben was around to tell me how many points I have won.

His avatar's gone (it went a while ago). Suggestions anyone? Ou est le Benjie?

Ahhhh...the man has probably got a life.

Expect to find him in a suit and tie next time you see him.

If not, he will probably be in somebody's conservatory footings.

I echo people's concerns.  I think there are a few possibilities.

1 - He has gone on a mad craze of cheap booze and crashing at people's houses.  If this is the case, then the chances are, BR, that he has not changed his clothes.

2 - He is finally sleeping off the booze of the past few years.  This could take a while.  Again, probably no changing of clothes.

3 - He has a job, although I believe we would be told of this occurance.  This would, however, mean a change of clothes.

4 - He has simply got bored of the TEF, spelling the beginning of the end for a once-proud forum.

5 - He drunkenly destroyed all of his computer equipment because "it looked at him funny".  (Amusing side story, I know a guy who actually threw his quite new laptop out of his bedroom window after a session because "the porn ain't downloading fast enough").

6 - He went away for the weekend and was about to post on here to tell of his amusing exploits, but stopped when he saw a thread dedicated to himself, and is now enjoying the ego trip with a glass of something.

concerning point 4, this forum was here before that dead cunt turned up.

I know, but it would be a less amusing place with his late night threads and antics.  Just an opinion, like.

I wondered why everything was staying on topic....

we never did finish that 80's BBC computer game

If he doesn't show by the weekend, I reckon Barry should compose a Requiem to Flammable Mass

How many days is it since his last post?

I could call his home phone in a bit and solve this.

(would text him but he wouldnt have credit and think his phone might be broken anyway)

I banned him

I'm guessing he is in Bristol and has been getting pissed at his mates for days.

Hello

Urgh. Have better things to do. Catch you all later.

Attention seeker.

sell out.

So I haven't missed much then?

nope! where you been to then you big gay bear?

Nowhere really. Just haven't been on the internet all that much.

not really normal for you though is it?

I take the occasional week or so away from the TEF. Normally nobody notices.

Cool, well hope you had a nice holiday!?

You mean when you have one of those crisis moments when you think "shit, what am I doing with my life?". If not, it should be.

You don't really know me at all do you samdy? If I was having some sort of life crisis I'd definitely get drunk and write a topic about it. An overly lengthy post with too many adjectives and a punchy rhythm dictated by random punctuation.

True.

Did FB stay at some old haunts in Exeter?

Nope. Didn't go to Exeter.

See, I told you - he got bored of the TEF.  Probably changed his clothes too.

Has he gone awol again?

I miss Ben :(

FFS mate don't start crying cos Ben hasn't posted for a couple of days.  :soapy tit wank:

Unfeeling bastard!

Yeah...just because Samdy has feelings for Benjani, doesn't make him gay or owt.

 It's a modern world....blokes can carry bags, and smell like raving poofters, without actually being gay.

 Some fellas go shopping for garden furniture, before the age of 60, and others prefer to hang out with birds from O*frodshire, rather than go to watch the Town.

 I'm just glad I'm an old bugger, with old fashioned values.

Yeah, Spy. Lay the fuck off.

Gay cunt

Fat cunt.

Prairie dog cunt - have it

I thought you would've dealt on fat cunt. Never mind. I'm out.

I'm pissed so fuck knows what the rules are - and i am indeed a fat cunt.

I'm slightly pissed too, but I'm not admitting to being a gay cunt.

Maybe when you've sobered up. you'll admit it

Maybe. I'm not sure how the wife'll take it.

There are several responses I could make but won't.

So it seems that fB has actually left the TEF.  I think we ought to pay tribute to his massive contribution over the past few years.  I have been an in and out contributor to this forum - he has obviously been one of the hardcore.  I think posters should pay tribute to him by posting about some of their favourite fB memories.

I'll start.  That thread where he got drunk, did a poo on the way home, and lost his wallet and keys in doing so.

N.B. I was actually a good mate of fB's for a very long time but moved away - if anyone actually knows what he is up to, please let me know.

He's probably getting drunk, taking speed and shitting in alleys. A much more rewardin actiity than trawling the internet because you can't sleep I suspect.

I'm halfway through a film but I'm losing interest.

His internet isn't working and he hasn't bothered to fix it yet cos he said he is enjoying being without it.

Odd this thread popped up. I was clearing some crap off my PC and came across something called XXZS - Coldpiss.

Ben's pisstake of Coldplay - funny as fuck.

I can't help but feel partly responsible for that. I was at Cheltenham away, the day some lads decided to get dressed up as Mexicans. I'd been up for about 36 hours on speed and still had some left. I saw fB looking rather worse for wear and kindly gave him the rest of my speed, the rest as they say, is history.

I don't actually know him  :) , but I do did like the "cookery shows" he did on here.  :eatkf:

Maybe he's actually got job and he's too ashamed to tell anybody.

Or maybe he's become sober/drug free.

I did explain this. Check reply #53.

It wouldn't surprise me if FB using another forum name. He can't resist the Townend.

             
   How Reggie Perrin-esque. It's always a possibility. I wouldn't rule it out.

:D

Hello Ben.

Spy, I can't help but feel I might know you.  Am I right?

Doore are you joking? It's Padge. Thought you knew it was me...

padge! Do I know you as well? Mince is a cunt.

I don't know if you know me. Do you?? From school? Don't get the mince comment.  ???

I didn't know anything.  Coolio.

Then you are not the padge I know.

Haha you knobs.

I decided to give the tef a rest for a bit thinking that it might be inspire me to do more interesting things. Then my internet broke. Fast forward a 3 or 4 weeks and I still haven't done anything interesting so might as well stick about on here. However boring all you cunts are.

Oi. Leave samdy alone. Whilst we might not always agree on everything in the crazy fast posting world of internet forums, he knows he can rely on me to try and sort him out a taxi home after he's fallen out with his fiancé and got an engagement ring thrown at his face. Even if I fail.

[url width=200 height=59]http://tindeck.com/image/xxzs/stats.png (http://tindeck.com/listen/xxzs)[/url]

To be honest, I just listened to it and cringed a bit.

Haha, I'd never heard that before. Good work Ben.

Why thankyou Sam. I'll be sure to do more sketchily poundlound microphone recorded audio bollocks in the future.

Benjamin, you have been away from this forum for a while......what about the football?

what about the football?

How lovely to have you back

x x

How could I not come back? I hope talking about it doesn't ruin it, but I couldn't leave the exciting sexual tension between us alone. I've been laying in bed at night thinking about how I'd flirt with you.

x x x

Nothing. That has answered my question  :)

I mean really?

We win. Some people get overexcited. Some people say it still wasn't good enough.

We lose. Some people say it wasn't that bad. Some people say we were shit and there has to be drastic changes.

We draw. Some people say it was a good result. Some people say we should have won.

I mean yeah, there's the minor details to include, but generally match talk follows a pretty similar pattern whatever the result. People tend to stick in the first or second group for any result too.

Yeah there's information on potential signings and behind the scenes stuff which I might miss out, but judging by the biggest discussion being about Fitton's band plee, I'm guessing I haven't missed much in the last 3-4 weeks. Maybe I'm wrong? Has there been any exciting football club happenings over the last month?

I've listened to the games and kept up with the FA Cup draw, which is more than enough.

I think the fact it sounds very amateur, raw and cringworthy adds to the humour. I can probably guess you were drunk as well. It's probably aged better than my ball sack.

Having read that back I don't think I'm good at giving compliments.

There's probably around a 110% (+/- 10%) chance that I was drunk.

Has your ballsack dropped yet?

Quite some time ago Ben. If I ever get the opportunity I might teabag you.

Something that we can both enjoy.

this reminded me that i miss you

I miss you too. Haven't seen you for ages. Will you be about before the Woking game?

i'm not going now, girlfriend is unwell. dunno when i'll next get to a game.

Well, as I always say, next time you pop into Swindon for whatever reason give us a shout and you can come round for a cup of tea.