Thetownend.com

Okay, he hasn't signed yet, and full backs don't get songs often, but I think that our upgraded model of Comminges (He isn't a bit mental cos he aint foreign- thanks Robbo) needs a song to celebrate his fantastic name.

I suggest fitting his name into Sabotage by the Beastie Boys

Listen All Of Y'all It's Amankwaah

Oh yes.

There are fewer more distressing sights than that of Amankwaah in a baseball cap.

Tie me Amankwaah down, sport.

:Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

 :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

Ground Control to Amankwaah,
your circuits dead, there's something wrong.
Can you hear me Amankwaah?

How about He's a Wanker he's a wanker but he's our Wanker ?

No ?

Thought not  :cry:

maybe try something with his full name Ben?

Kevin Kwaku Osei-Kuffour Amankwaah

Amankwaah superstar,
Do you think you're what they say you are?

Osei-Kuffour? Is he related to our old striker Jo?

Hey there Amankwaah
What's it like in New York City?
I'm a thousand miles away
But girl, tonight you look so pretty
Yes you do
Times Square can't shine as bright as you
I swear it's true

Amankwaah, Amankwaah, never before has a boy asked for more.

wow if you look on his wikipedia page he has links to lots of our old players plus other interesting crap

Car crash involving Aarron Brwon - check
replaced Matt Hewlett - check
Mother who competed in the commonwealth games - check

wowwee

When the dog bites, when the bee stings,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my Amankwaah things,
and then I don't feel so bad.

Amankwaah
He's the man, the man with the Midas touch
A spider's touch
Such a cold finger
Beckons you to enter his web of sin
But don't go in

Are you going to Amankwaah Fair?
Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme,
Remember me to one who lives there,
For he once was a true love of mine.

the red car and Amankwaah had a race
all that red could do was stuff his face
he eats everything he sees
from trucks to prickly trees
but Amankwaah he took the milky way

Erm....

What's that coming over the hill
Is it a Amankwaah? Is it Amankwaah?

I'll get my coat.

best one yet - I laughed so much a bit of wee came out  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

I can see everyone singing that in the townend

su-per-Kev-in-Kwa-ku-Os-ei-Kuf-four-Am-ank-waah-cious
even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious
if you say it loud enough you'll always sound precocious
su-per-Kev-in-Kwa-ku-Os-ei-Kuf-four-Am-ank-waah-cious

stop now - its getting too much for an old dear on a Friday afternooon  :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick:

That's absolute class.

I love a bit of Mary Poppins - can we have more players songs attached to Mary Poppins songs please

I'm songed out.

His name fits quite well into the 'One finger, one thumb' tune. Too lazy to think of anything to go on the end though.

booo that can be your homework then!

No I'm not



Just a Spoonful of Ifil?

What a friend we have in Jesus,
He's a saviour from a far.
What a friend we have in Jesus,
And is name is Amankwaah.

Ooh ahh Amankwaah.
Ooh ahh Amankwaah.
Ooh ah,
Ooh ahh,
Ooh ahh Amankwaah.
Ooh ahhh A-man-kwaah.....

Ooh! Ah! Amankwaah!
Say ooh ah Amankwaah!
Ooh! Ah! Amankwaah!
Say ooh ah Amankwaah!

Days of speed of speed and slow time Mondays
Pissing down with rain on boring Wednesdays
Watching the news and not eating your tea
A freezing cold flat and damp in the walls I say

Kev-in Amankwaah
Kev-in Amankwaah....aaaaah

Kevin Amankwaah....aah aah aah
Kevin-Amankwaah...aah aah aah
Kevin Amankwaah

wow cant beat a hymn like song!

I have no idea how sam's song goes.

Amankwaah fit's in Kumbaya which is easy and obvious.

You and me baby ain't nothing but mammal
So let's do it like they do on the Amankwaah channel

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like Amankwaah in the wind
Never fading with the sunset
When the rain set in

And I think it’s gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I’m not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I’m a Amankwaah
Amankwaah burning out his fuse up here alone

Didn't we have a lovely time the day we signed Amankwaah,
......

This thread made my boring day!

I'm burning through the skies Yeah!
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Amankwaah
I'm trav'ling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic man of you

I was trying to fit Amankwah into "mandy" by manillow....it kind of fits but i couldnt be bothered to think of witty lyrics.

I have to say, the Mary Poppins one wins and SHOULD be sung! Not sure how you'd get everybody to remember his full name though!

It's the Ooh-Aah Cantona song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Je82z30emMk

His name is Kevin
Kevin Amankwaah (sp??)
With yellow feathers in her hair
And a dress cut down to there


Ok I got lazy towards the end but I am happy that I have planted some seeds of thought here.

Kevin Amankwaah,
Isn't he wonderful?
Kevin Amankwaah,
Watch him defend the goal (to the tune of isn't she lovely by Stevie Wonder. Credit to my girlfriend for this one, she gets very invested in coming up with players songs)

we all agree our right back is amankwaah.

 :D  I like

Am-ank-waah-waah-waah, push pineapple, shake the tree
Am-ank-waah-waah-waah, push pineapple, grind coffee
To the left, to the right, jump up and down and to the knees
Come and dance every night, sing with a hula melody

 :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick: Class!

Amankwaah, woah-o
Amankwaah, woah-o
He crashed with Aaron Brown,
He's come to Swindon Town

Or something to that effect...

Your first effort was great. Should have quit while ahead!  :D

Well, you know...

To the tune of 'Where do you go' by No Mercy:

Where do you go Amankwaah
Where do you go,
I wanna know Amankwaah, I wanna know...

He's Amankwaah, He's Amankwaah
And he does it good
Like he bloody well should

I lose it on the Am-ank-waah-cious , that should be the easiest bit but it aint. Can everyone sing this please if the cunt scores.

The fucking "-cious" wouldn't have to be there if the cunt had one more syllable in his name. Lazy bastard.

Of course that would mean changing the middle two lines for the rhyme, but they should probably be changed anyway.

I've got it now - I was singing in my head, or so I thought, on the bus this morning - oops!
Sign him up...Sign him up...Sign him up...

A-mank-wah-able
that's what you are
A-mank-wah-able
though near or far

For those that are familiar with the Sound of Music we could sing (instead of so long, farewell, auf weidersehen, goodbyeeee)

Kevin Kwaku, Osei-Kuffour Amankwaah,
he left Swansea, to be a Swindon player
da da da da da da da da da.....

I'll get my coat.

Signed now then, Byrne could have dressed up for the occasion!

Did anyone else notice something missing from the announcement?  The transfer is not subject to Football League approval as we've paid off the CVA.

A small point but something else to thank our new owners for.

I've heard from just about every Swansea fan that I've talked to that he's a terrible player.

Personal opinion really, i'm not going to judge him till i've seen him play.

I'm sure Northampton fans didn't rave about Parkin before he joined us.

Agree with Mr V, I'll wait and see how he gets on before I judge.

I remember him being good, but i don't know if it was in real life or FM07...

He obviously had something about him to make Swansea pay £200k for him a couple of years ago.  A lot of money for a League 1 Right back.  

I think he'll be good after a slowish start for us.

Where is Bart, I am surprised that he hasn't said what a shit signing he is yet, along with Malpas being shit, and the board being tight ect ect blah blah.

He said something about it being uninspiring or something similar didn't he?

Ah yeah, I remember know, although that was before he signed, I thought that Bart would still have come to have a bitch after it being made official.

Maybe he has fallen in Love?

but then every Yeovil fan you speak to thinks hes quality....

Players just fit into some teams better than others. We'll just have to wait and see how he does there. Big strong dude who doesn't mind getting forward yeah? Sounds like he could fit into are team, overlapping with whoever's ahead of him.

That'll be McGovern mincing around then.

Although to be fair I thought he looked better with commigues overlapping him and making up for his own lack of pace.

let's hope he's a good un.must have had something about him for swansea to shell out on him.i hope he can get good form for us.
let's hope a few more are added to him aswell.

Jack Smith will see him off

To the tune of teddy bears picnic...
http://www.vcei.org/tbp-words.htm

If you go down to the town today
you're sure of a big surprise
If you come down to the town today
you ain't going to believe your eyes
For every man, wherever he stands
is singing loud and clapping his hands
cos todays, the day Amankwaah
whips a cross in...

chorus:
Picnic time for Amankwaah
Our Kevin Amankwaahs having a lovely time today.
Watch him catch you unawares
and see us score like we're on holiday.
See him push that ball about
He loves to play and shout
and never have any cares.
At 5 0'clock your coaches and cars
will take you home to bed
but you'll remember Kevin aman-k-waah!!

Way too much time on your hands Triseros ! - grass not growing quickly enough ?

Looks like he is smoking the grass based on that Nev

nope! need some miracle grow!!!

Judging by the size of the lawnmower on the OS, you'd think he'd have no time for forum posting! Must take ages to cut a whole pitch like that!

that ain't me that's Marcus - I'm twice as big and so's me mower :-)

Anyway - it only took me 5 minutes to write this one...

Ah right - I always thought you were Marcus. Oops.  :oops:

Now you say you're bigger than him I think I know who you must be