Thetownend.com

I had some old dear come up to me (in Marlboroughs Waitrose funnily enough) pinching my cheeks (no, not like that) and telling me how big I'd grown and how handsome I was looking these days- wahey- but you know, like old aunties etc do?

I'd never met this person in my life.

that's class

She was obviously mad and thus you're 5 foot 1 and look like Wayne Rooney.

awkward moment...

when you see someone you know, but not very well (perhaps from a drunken party) and you know they know who you are, but you dont know wether they will acknowldege you. so you leave yourselfopen to be acknowledged but they're not sure whether you recognise them so they are unsure about acknowldeging you. you know, that one  :-))(

I know that one

Yes and I hate it

I've had enough of these to last me a lifetime.

Was at a friend's party a few months ago and had their mum come up behind me and hug me giving me a little peck on the neck and inquiring how I was doing.  To her utter horror, I turned round and she realised I wasn't her son....  There was nothing to do but laugh.

Consoling a mate who has just split up with their girlfriend is always difficult - have had this today funnily enough.  No one wants to be the one who breaks the silence, but someone has to say something but what do you say?

"You'll be alright mate, we'll go out on the pull Saturday night" could leave them in floods of tears, or could be a good matey thing to say to cheer 'em up.  Its especially difficult if your own love-life is going well, so next time you break up with someone, just think of how awkward you're making the lives of people around you!

When a bird says to you about a session of rampant love making...and in all honesty you can't remember a thing about it....because you were so out of the head.

 Very embarrassing.

Yeah I know that one, happens a lot. Also I'm always seeing people who seem to know me but I have no idea who they are but then I generally remember who they are a few hours later. It's annoying.

Calling the wrong name out during sex?

C'mon, whose done it?

Id say " pull yourself together you ponce and get the beers in"

last year loads of people came up to me and said 'hello simon' or 'how's things simon'. Didn't have a bloody clue who they were and still don't to this day  :oops:

fucking soapy tit wank Yeovil  :D  :D

'Ponce', btw

Waking up with a fat bird who's name you cant remember at your own house so you cant do a runner,though I have actually done a runner from my own house once. :soapy tit wank:

   But surely you only embarrass yourself Dave :wink:

   :Ride On Fatbury's Lovestick

Hahaha that's quality.

Why did that particular occasion neccessitate you doing a runner, Yeovil?

My money's on a chick with a dick

The classic morning after in bed with a girl who's name you don't remember in a house/apartment and you don't have a clue where it is.  Then the walk of shame  

Sex on TV in front of your parents.  I can handle boobs even fanjita but rampant graphic sex and buggery in front of the old folks is a little bit to much.  I often feed the cat.

Street dodging knobs.  I fuckin hate these dicks they walk towards you in your path and then dodge left to right as you try and walk past making you both look like a pair of numpties.

knowing you've done something really daft on a drunken rampage but not quite knowing what...the look that your housemates give you the next day, you know they sorta crane their necks to the side and look at you  :-))(

I can't remember properly ,I think she was a sort of mate that I accidently ended up banging and she started getting clingy almost straight away the next morning.
I had the choice of saying " look Im not interested in you like that lets put this down to experience" or running away and avoiding her like the plague for the rest of my life which is a bit sad really .I'm a total coward with thiat sort of thing.

Just say "I told her this morning when I was getting out of her bed that you wouldn't take it well if she finished with you - hard to bear, mate"

Not you!

ahahahahah :|

what the hell have you been watching with your parents  :roll:

What about when you are driving and you think you see someone you know and wave at them, then realise you don't know them but they wave back ha ha!!

my mate does that to random people on purpose. He finds it hilarious to see their confused faces  :?

i was woken up by my mum at 10 in evenin, she had just got back in from the pub and i was asleep in my suit on the kitchen table.

all i'm saying is heavy day at the races  :oops:  :oops:  :beers

actually today in my law seminar my lecturer posed the question:
"and how do we determine if someone is actually disabled"

I think of Gareth from the Office and struggle to contain my laughter. Luckily others were thinking the same thing as me so it wasn't as  :oops: