whats the best way to wipe your arse?

[kerry red]

I was in the RAF many years ago and I got up one morning to go for a shower/shave and somebody had shat in the sink.

Put me off me breakfast that - especially the sausages.

[Matchworn Shirts]

The townend topics just get better and better

the level of intellectual conversation is going down the pan

[Posh Red]

Deffo a stander, however being on holiday in the states they have the automatic flushing bogs which means they flush when you stand up to wipe, very off putting

[Honky McCracker]

Ive developed a wipe/pinching technique, sitting down, front to back. It works so well if physically possible Id eat my dinner off my own arse.