Thetownend.com

Elephants are the only mammals to have four knees.

Also another fact is that Random has a m in it

DRS is a pedantic cunt

FACT

you cant use New Look gift vouchers to pay for things on there online shop on top of a 20% discount code!!  >:(

Pajero means wanker in Spanish. Mitzibishi (sp) used to make a car called the Pajero. Not sure if this is an urban myth or not actually.

It might be a myth, but the Vauxhall/Opel Nova wouldn't sell in Spain because NoVa means won't go

Hence the change to Corsa  (that might also be a myth but Mex's linguistic ability could confirm)

Skoda means shit car in English.

An Ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain

Who needs Mex, Babelfish says you are correct, No Va = It does not go

It's illegal to eat snakes in Iraq (and even more surprisingly Kansas) on a Sunday.

The Catholic church class beavers as a fish, which means you can eat them on Fridays during lent or whatever the rule is.

According to statistics, Monday is the most popular day to commit suicide.

More semen is found in public swimming pools than saliva.

  It's true Bob, my brother in law has one>  Turtles breathe through their bottoms!

Chop-suey is not a native Chinese dish, it was created in California by Chinese immigrants

But then you wouldn't expect to find that much semen in saliva anyway would you? Apart from Gillian Taylforth's of course

Judging by some films I've "heard about" I'd argue that more semen is found in saliva

Curses, beaten by a ''short head"

The King of Hearts is the only King without a moustache :)

Andy King doesnt have a moustache

∴ Andy King of Hearts

Women are 37% more likely to go to a psychiatrist than men are.

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of unwanted people without killing them used to burn their houses down -- hence the expression "to get fired"

According to statistics, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

A bakers dozen is 13...years ago if a baker sold people bread and the weight wasnt correct it was a hangable offence...so to avoid any doubt when 12 loaves were sold an extra one was thrown in to make sure the weight was correct.

OH.MY.GOD did you REALLY have to tell me that of all people!!  :eek: :cry:

Ive never heard that fact before actually

Customs & Excise do not need a warrant to search your premises...

in 2007 there were reportedly 860,000 accidents solely attributed to drunkeness and over 1,300,000 car accidents but only 38,500 accidents caused by drinking and driving...  which statistically means you are less likely to be involved in an accident when drink driving...

There's definitely a flaw to your logic there Triseros!

According to the 2001 census there are no Sikhs in Chipping Norton.

Big Census Linky Link (http://neighbourhood.statistics.gov.uk/dissemination/LeadTableView.do?a=7&b=6074564&c=Chipping+Norton&d=14&e=16&g=481610&i=1001x1003x1004&m=0&r=1&s=1228313593938&enc=1&dsFamilyId=95)

Sikhs are ace. One of my favourite religions. Chipping Norton is losing out.

when you were a school did you ever read a book called "Pavan is a Sikh"?

Don't think so. Although it does sound familiar.

I have a Sikh best mate... i can confirm he's pretty ace.

I used to work with a Sikh, he was a top lad.

I reckon the Sikh community will be super chuffed with our endorsements.

I may as well do it.

I don't think they will be Sikh of our comments.

We''ll have to find them first, they are fond of playing hide and sikh

HAR HAR HAR

Roy Keane's middle name is Maurice. 

My middle name is David, last name James.
I'm David James. Hurrah.

Im jealous - I want some more multi-cultural freinds - my sister went to an Indian wedding the other day - she said it was ace!

You wouldn't get in a taxi with a bloody Asian the other day!

Oh yeah sorry I forgot Im a racist bitch!   ::)

No, apparently just a hypocrite.

I really need to stop biting!!

Nah, i'm quite fond of that... and scratching

No nail extensions any more  :cry:

bloody credit crunch!

I dont understand nail extentions... why dont you just grow them?

I read that post so wrong - I read it as multicoloured  :doh:

ummmm Im not sure really - I had them on constantly for over 3 years - my nails were RUINED when I finally had them off - It cost me a fortune but I loved the way my hands always looked neat and well groomed.

I always used to break them at work though

Its taken the best part of a year to get my nails healthy again! I dont miss them at all now - I just paint them if Im off out!! 

hahaha, awesome. i wish i had more friends who dipped themselves in paint at random.

i worked with a sikh and he was brilliant. one of very few people i miss from that job.

multi coloured friends would be nice too

all the girls could be pink and the boys could be blue 

Norway was rated the most peaceful country in the world, in a survey conducted by Global Peace Index in 2007.

Norway is counted amongst the wealthiest countries of the world.

The per capita income of Norway ranks among the highest in the world.

Norway is the sixth largest country of Europe, in terms of land mass. However, in terms of population, it ranks only 28th.

The Christmas tree, which stands in Trafalgar Square in London, has been presented by ‘City of Oslo’ to the UK, for over fifty years.

My mates uncle is Norwegian, and a multi millionaire, lucky man.

I went to Norway for my mates stag do.

In Oslo you can get heroin (from your dealer) cheaper than you can buy a pint of beer (in certain bars).

Norway's ace, but not as ace as Sweden or Denmark.

Hartlepool have Norwegian owners/directors............

In Sweden on 1 January 1994, there was the same number of 8 year old girls (112,521) as there were 9 year old girls on 1 January 1995, with no migration or death, which is unique in all population statistics.

Thanks QI (and it's wikipedia pages, which have a list of all the questions/facts which have been on each episode of the show. Good for an hours reading.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_QI_episodes_(B_series)

here's a fact: norway rulez

He has a very soft beard.

I'm also convinced the person in question was born 6ft tall!!!

Škoda is, in fact, Czech for shame.

Pajero is a car, pakero is wanker, but only in certain areas of spain, best to use ponetero, then spanish people will think you are cool and from central america.

I have an 8 inch penis

so do i

When bats leave a cave they always turn left!

Even sikh bats which are well cool!!! Just getting on the whole i love other religions bandwagon)

Prince Harry's real name is Henry.

There are approx 5,987, 583, 763,289,576,276 pebbles on Brighton beach

I know you said approx, but I think there are 2 less after Mex found that BNP house a couple of weeks back...

I discovered an interesting fact today thanks to the good people at Nationwide.

I asked them a question using there online banking thing. It was a straightforward question asking them if there was any reason why they process debits before credits, other than it stacks the odds in their favour when it comes to stinging people for charges.

The answer I got was....

'I can confirm that debits are taken before credits because that's how our system works'

They could have simply replied 'No' and saved themselves some time.

I just suddenly realised that Michael Dorn, famous for playing Worf in Star Trek, did the voice of Marcus the Super Mutant in Fallout 2. I've spent many hours playing Fallout 2, and watching Star Trek, but it only just randomly clicked into place as I was watching some DS9. I wonder how I've never noticed before. Madness.

He also did voices for WoW "for the horde" but I didn't tell you that.

Ace. I've never played WoW. I'm far too cool.

Also, I've never had a computer good enough to play it.

Indian Railway is the largest employer in the world. The NHS 3rd largest

What's the second?

The taliban

you're losing your touch. i'd get the missus to start posting again.

For crying out loud, David! All I was doing was highlighting Nationwide's inability to justify how they maximise their chances of collecting charges. I know a recent survey showed that I'm 8.2% funnier than Ben, but must every post I make be expected to reduce the forum to a state of pant-wetting hilarity. Maybe you could improve the quality of the forum by telling us one of your wonderful golf stories about how you managed to come 5th in a tournament despite being a bellend. Now fuck off back to your halls and sniff some crack or whatever forms of debauchery you student leeches get up to.

its impossible to hum if you got your fingers up your nose

Now that is funny, especially the "you managed to come 5th in a tournament despite being a bellend" gag!!!

No it isn't.

*Edit*

I just tried and you are right.

1. Coca-Cola was originally green.
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2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
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3. The name of all the continents ends with the same letter that they start
with.
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4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
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5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.
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6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters
only on one row of the keyboard.
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7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
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8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath..
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9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you
Sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.
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11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
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12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the
toughest tongue twister in the English language.
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13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to
Suppress a sneeze; you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck
and die.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king from
History. "Spades" - King David; "Clubs" - Alexander the Great;
“Hearts" - Charlemagne; "Diamonds" - Julius Caesar.
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15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
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16. If a statue of a warrior on a horse has both front legs
in the air, the person died in battle. If the
horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds
received in battle.
If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural
causes.
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17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and
laser printers all have in common?
Ans. - All invented by women.
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18. Honey - This is the only food that doesn't spoil.
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19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
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20. A snail can sleep for three years.
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21. All polar bears are left handed.
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22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive
from each salad served in first-class.
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23. Butterflies taste with their feet.
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24. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
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25. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
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26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
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27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and 'bump'.
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28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
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29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
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30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
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31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the
body to squirt blood 30 feet.
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32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over
million descendants.
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33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in
your ear by 700 times.
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34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match box.
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35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
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36.. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different

You can still hum, just for not very long periods, in fact for about 3 seconds at a time, but humming with fingers up your nose is still possible.

How about the Chinese Army ? (not the Terracotta ones)

That's only if you still call Oceania, Australasia, and describe the Americas North and South as one continent, which a lot of people don't now.

Oh and some of Bob's list are notorious urban myths, several of which have been exposed on QI over the last couple of series.

Yeah. The statue one jumped out at me. They did that one didn't they?

And the polar bears.

The internet is full of mad myths about them using their right paws to cover up their noses as they stalk their prey.

Total bollocks obviously.

I just tried to lick my elbows... :-[

I just copied and pasted from an email I got today.

No idea if they are true or not!

So you're happy to spread LIES on t'net!

How irresponsible!

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